The reason I don't have any of those applications on Facebook where you can give people presents is because they're ANNOYING as all hell. It's like a gigantic tease. For instance, you can give someone a Mrs. Fields' cookie. WHO THE CRAP WANTS A PRETEND COOKIE? When you give me a pretend cookie, I get pissed off because now I want a real cookie, but it's just a MEGABYTE cookie. And you actually get excited for a split second before it registers that it isn't a real cookie. How freaking unsatisfying is that???

Participatory Blogocracy
0. Finish the following sentence in the comments section:
"The truth is..."
1. Dude. Computer is on its last leg. Need a new one. Someone send me $300. Check or money orders only. This blog is not free and it's time to pay up.
1.5 Okay, it's free.
2. WERE MOVING THE ISLAND TONIGHT. And I'm not telling you where we're moving it to. And then I'm supposed to wait until... January?
3. New job = 4 hours/day of me highlighting things. Who doesn't love highlighters? Big bonus: No one in this office talks. It's like my hermit anti-social dream come true. Soon I will discover how to turn my computer just so, so that no one can tell I'm playing Scrabulous all day. And then it will be ON, Dad.
4. My sister is ruining my life by refusing to let me blog about her job.
5. Got a new bike. Biking is hard. I would much rather run five miles than bike five miles. Running doesn't hurt my butt.

Stuffwhitepeoplelike.com called out me and my one bumper sticker today.

Funniest Things Of My Life. This Week.

1. I never would have gone for Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but Danny told me it was good. I know to listen to Danny's funniness opinions, because they are impeccable, because I spent my whole life teaching him all that he knows. Except the science-related stuff. That stuff is boring and he learned it all on his own. Anyways, the movie was really freaking hilarious. Sometimes, it was hard to hold it together, but I did, because I was simultaneously fearing for my life. I went to see the movie at 2pm, by myself because I wasn't working. I was the only one in the theatre for a while until a middle-aged man walked in and sat a few rows up. From then on, I pictured him sneaking up behind me with a bit of rope and choking me to death, with no one to hear me scream. Luckily, it turned out he was just there to see the movie and not to kill me.

2. Stephen Colbert. again.
Particularly this:

Awesomest thing a fourth grader said to me yesterday when I was subbing

"This is boring! B-O-R-R-I-N-G, boring!"

A Thing Or Five

1. To papasan or not to papasan?
The truth is, I do not think that papasan chairs are attractive in any way. But, they are the most comfortable chair on earth. And they're perfect for my sunroom. So. Papasan? No papasan? Form over function? These are the things I deal with on a daily basis.

2. I just beat my dad at Scrabulous
Now he has beat me once and I have beaten him once. The third game will tell who is more scrabtastic.

3. I worry that the rap video girls are going to have serious knee problems when they get older. I don't know if you've ever tried to 'get low', but it's very taxing on your knees. I feel as if whoever sings that song (Is that Nelly? It sounds like Nelly to me. I am so uncool.) shouldn't be promoting it.

4. I love my clothesline. So much.

5. I do not love my flowerboxes, which have failed to bloom.

Graduation, Etc.

I have a camera that works now. Okay, I borrowed a camera that works. Regardless. Pictures.