I'm An Idiot and The Pirate Window

You know how when you're waiting for something- like good news, say- every time the phone rings you think it's whatever you're waiting for? So, every time my phone rings the past week or so, I think "oh! maybe Brady's about to be born!"
Then I remember that I'm the one having the baby, and would probably not be getting a call from someone telling me I'm in labor.

In the meantime, while I'm waiting for myself to call myself and tell me I'm in labor, I've been buying baby clothes on eBay. Awesome deals! But this is my pet peeve (there's always got to be a pet peeve, right? I can't just be happy..): Ralph Lauren/Burberry/Roca Wear/Sean John/Nike baby clothes. Someone is going to have to explain to me:
1. Why they even MAKE designer baby clothes
2. Why people BUY designer baby clothes.

What are you thinking?? They're BABIES. They mess stuff up. They can't control their drool!! They grow out of clothing in like 10 seconds! And yet, on eBay, people bid on this stuff like CRAZY! There was a baby Burberry shirt going for $50 yesterday. I just can't figure out why you would even care if your baby was wearing Burberry. Babies are supposed to wear cute stuff, not trendy stuff. The other day I bought a green onesie with a pirate on it saying "arrgh!" and some striped pants to match. The whole thing cost me $1 at the baby resale shop. Here's the thing: people have their whole lives to wear Burberry. But you can only get away with putting a kid in a pirate onesie for a very limited window of time. It's called the Pirate Window. See, right now, kids look absolutely adorable in hats with bear ears attached. Not too many years down the road, however, wearing clothing with bear ears is going to be your first sign of some serious social maladjustments. Embrace the bear ears. Do not waste the Pirate Window on friggin Burberry.