I'M F-ING BLONDE, DAMNIT!!

So today I went to get my hair done- I've been looking forward to this for quite some time now, I was sick of my hair but I was waiting to get it cut until after the wedding. I even went to a nice place, which is rare for me, because I was getting a cut and blonde highlights. The hair gods are laughing at me. First of all, ALL OF MY HAIR HAS BEEN CHOPPED OFF. I asked for it to be an inch above my shoulders. It must be like, 3 inches above my shoulders. Secondly, I asked for blonde HIGHLIGHTS. I swear to you my whole freaking head is blonde. And its not even the same COLOR blonde- the bottom of my head where the dye was in longer is like WHITE and the top is a golden-y color.