Today, Rob comes home and says to me "You know what song I really like? That 'Lonely Spider' song by Death Cab for Cutie"
I say "I've never heard this song"
Rob says "Google it"
So I google it.
Know what the real words are?
Not "Lonely Spider". It's "Soul Meets Body"
But really, isn't the world waiting for someone to write a song about a lonely spider? None of that itsy bitsy crap, thank you.

Sometimes, I feel like a rap star because Rob and I drink champagne on Tuesday nights. Now, granted, the bottle of champagne cost less than $10. But, still, I feel like a baller.

What exactly is a baller? Does it involve basketball in any way? Is it like a player? Regardless, I am one. You know how it goes. After the show it's the after party. After the party it's the hotel lobby. After the Belvedere it's probably Crist (that's 'Christal' for all you non-ballers out there). And after the original it's probably this.

That reminds me of a story. A few weeks ago, crazy secretary was doing the ID pictures at school and she gets this kid up there and in this crazy fake-o voice she says "SMILE!". The kid flashes this big smile and he's wearing a grill. It was hiLARious.

My favorite part of that Wikipedia entry is this:
Dentists have issued warnings notifying people who are wearing grills of the serious damage they can cause including gum infections, irritations, and cavities. Prolonged wearing of grills allows food and bacteria to become trapped underneath. In addition, though expensive grills such as those made from gold or platinum are cited as being "bio-compatible" (and thus are presumably non-allergenic), cheaper grills made from non-precious metals like nickel can cause allergic reactions. It is estimated that "one out of every seven people have a metal allergy" according to Dr. Matt Messina, consumer advisor of the American Dental Association. [1]

4 out of 5 dentists do NOT recommend grills.

Today, I checked my messages at work for the first time in 2 weeks. There were 179 messages. I figured I would never catch up, so I just erased them all so I can start over tomorrow.

Crazy secretary was being a be-ah at work today. I smiled at her. Then I cursed all of her future generations.

I'm applying for a new job. Even though there's no indication that I'll get it, I still kind of feel like a double agent at work.
Thought process:
"Laura, we should set up a calendar for reserving the career center"
Okay, I'll do that now, but I won't be here long enough to use it!
"Oh, hi, you're the new secretary?"
For now. But don't get used to me.

Again, no indication whatsoever, but whatever keeps me going, you know?
Time now to do some writing and make good on the $40,000 I spent.