On Suckiness

There are approx. 250 staff members in my building.
Me and one other person have to work on Friday. That's it. Why? Because it's a conference comp. day and secretaries don't work conferences.
The nonsensicalness of this boggles the mind.
Here will be my day on Friday:

*phone rings*
"Hello? (pause) No, they're not in today."

Rinse and repeat. All. Day. Long.
ACTUALLY, no. That won't even be my day. Because the school is CLOSED, and no one will try to call because they will think to themselves, THE SCHOOL IS CLOSED.
This is what is even more mind-boggling to me, though.
Three, count them, three people, none of whom are my boss or higher up than me, upon finding out that I have to work, have said to me "Well, that's too bad. But, you know, if you have to be here, I can find something for you to do."
What possesses a person to say such a thing?
Yes, people. It's not enough that I have to work while you have the day off, please, PLEASE!, LET ME DO YOUR FREAKING WORK FOR YOU WHILE I'M HERE.
Moving along..

Favorite work story of the week: This girl comes into my office and says "The security guards took something away from me, where do I go to get it back?"
Me: "Depends, what was it?"
What do you think it was?
Dice.
The girl was playing dice in the hallway and betting and got it taken away.