Living With Rob

On walking through the rain for 18 blocks...
Rob: How much farther?
Me: Not much farther
Rob: Riiiggghhhttt.. Like Trail of Tears not much farther or for real not far?

On me throwing out his COMPLETELY DEAD bamboo plant...
Rob: WHY DID YOU THROW IT OUT???
Me: Rob. It was dead.
Rob: How do you know it was dead?
Me: It was yellow and flaky.
Rob:....Maybe it was resting.