Oh, Bronxville/Stepford Pt. 2
So, first a little backstory-
We park our car 5 minutes away from the house because Bronxville doesn't allow overnight parking on the street in the village and the parking lots are $120 a month. So, right over the bridge from us is technically not the village, so we can park overnight.
Okay, begin story-
So I get to my car this morning and there's this typed sheet of paper that says
This area is 2 hour Residential parking, not Bronxville or Commuter parking. Yonkers Parking Authority will ticket if called.
I'm sorry? What's that? Do I hear a threat?
Oh yeah, lady, I know who you are. You're the one who's always out gardening by the curb who gives me the evil eye when I park.
It would be one thing if it was really busy over there and the residents couldn't find a space, but there's TONS of parking. Besides, they all have GARAGES over there.
So I took my little note and went down to the Yonkers Police Station and asked them if it was legit where I was parking, and they're like "yeah, that's perfectly fine, that's just a resident trying to scare you." And I got the officers names, in case Hawkeye Curb Gardner wants to give me any crap about it.
Tonight I'm going to put this note on the inside of my windshield-
Dear Anonymous Note Leaver-
Thank you for your concerns about my parking. I took your note down to the Yonkers Police Department and they said that where I was parking was perfectly legal. This side of the street is neither 2 hour parking nor designated as residential. Thanks for your concern, however.
Aw yeah, Bronxville, what's up now? You wanna mess with me? I'll take you down. And THEN I'll do a little dance in you curb garden.
Saturday, September 10, 2005
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2 comments:
The Yonkers police station... that's awesome. You know how when there's a drug bust and they're about to kick down a door, but first they announce themselves giving the people either chance to load their gun or escape? You know when they're standing outside and go "LAPD! OPEN THE DOOR!" or "NYPD! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!" I wish the show Cops would go to Yonkers so I could hear them yell "Yonkers Police! Drop your weapon!" Cuz if you're a criminal, yeah you know you're in trouble, but also you probably get a little chuckle because that sounds so funny. Same with the cops in Kalamazoo, Timbuctu, Tipperary, Katmandu, Flushing or Hell.
I got that same note once over the summer when I used to park there and go to Brooklyn. I got home one day after weeks of claiming a parking spot to find the same exact type. I wrote Fuck you on it in big letters but then just shoved it in my glove compartment. I should have kept on parking there leaving the note on the windshield but I haven't parked there since. Those people probably have nothing better to do than annoy other people by being so goddamn annoying.
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