A Few Bones To Pick...

I spent a good hour yesterday typing out this great short story that I wanted everyone to read, but then all the sudden I got worried that it was copyright infringement and I would be sued by someone, so I took it down.
So.
Everyone read "Drawer" by Rick Moody. It's 2 pages long. I'll expect a book report.

Bone to pick #1- Western... What the crap?

Today I needed to print something out. And god knows that I'm too cheap to buy a printer, so I went on campus to print it. Years ago, back in my day, there used to be this fantastic lawn between Waldo Library and Knauss Hall (that's "Knaw-s". Not "Ka-Nouse". Say Ka-Nouse and I'll punch you.) where you could go and lay out and read between classes. Now, where the lawn used to be, there is a GIGANTIC new chemistry building. Seriously. Screw chemistry. Give me the flipping lawn back. I don't even like chemistry. I'll meet your chemistry building and raise you a lawn. That didn't make any sense, but I wanted to say it anyways.

Bone to pick #2- Sure, someday maybe I'll be well paid. But for now, please let me answer your phones
Today my job hunt took a decidedly bad turn. I took my MFA off of my resume. Why? Because no one wants to hire me. They think that if you have a Masters degree you should be able to find a well-paying job. Well, they're wrong. And so now, in order to get any job whatsoever and not starve to death, I have to lie.
Michigan, you are so lucky you are the state of Great Lakes, Great Times, because otherwise, I would abandon you so fast and go somewhere where they actually hire people. How can I do such things when a Pleasant Peninsula Awaits Me? I cannot, I cannot. Once again, Michigan, you have me wrapped around you're little mitten.

There will be more bones to pick, but right now I'm going to bed.