New York driving- what the fk?

Let me describe to you the phenomenon that is New York driving. Okay, so everyone is in this huge freaking impatient rush. Michigan- You only honk if you’re pretty pissed off, and if you get honked at, you’re really offended. New York- You honk if a bug flies in front of your windshield. I was sitting at a light today, and a guy starts honking before the light even turns green. But the thing is, no one gives a crap if they get honked at. But, this is not my problem. My biggest problem- the New York “pull over and chat it up” complex. Michigan- you see someone you know on the street, you either honk and wave or you pull over and find a parking spot. New York- See someone you know? Oh! Well, just stop your car in the middle of the lane and start a conversation. Can’t find a parking space on the street? Just park it in the middle of the lane and go in. Here’s the think I don’t get- NOBODY HONKS!!! They just pull into the next lane (without fail, cutting someone off) and go around them. Hello?? Honk if you have no reason, remain patient and go around when there’s an actual law being broken?? I don’t get it.

Pictures of our Apartment!! (ignore the lack of wall decoration, we haven't gotten that far yet..)

Click here to check out my new picture page.

Truckers, You Know You're Not Right...

So, I'm driving today. And I'm stopped at a stop light, and there's this semi next to me and he keeps inching forward a few inches and then hitting his breaks, two or three times. So, I'm thinking, what, is he trying to tell me that I'm not pulled up far enough? So I look up at him. Oh no, he's doing nothing of the sort. He's moving forward and craning his head so he can look in my car and he has this disgusting "im a dirty, dirty man" smile on his face. LISTEN UP TRUCKERS. AT NO PLACE ON YOUR OPERATOR'S LICENSE DOES IT SAY 'PERMITTED TO BE TOTALLY DISGUSTING'. I realize that you don't see other people for long periods of time. This does not mean that you have the go ahead for the oggoling of people driving beside you. Seriously.

Here I am, at the friendly neighborhood Yonkers Public Library. I'm tired of putting things away in the apartment. Doing anything adventurous seems like a lot of work. Last night I was going to rent a movie but then I realized that I would lose my parking place (which are few and far between) and decided not to. And I am broke, my friends. Oh there are a million things to do around here. And they all require some sort of money. For another two weeks or so, money is not something I have. I found some outlet malls and was planning on going to them today, when I realized that window shopping at an outlet mall would be a bittersweet experience. I just want to start school and get things going, because this whole "entertaining yourself in a thrifty way" thing is not working out for me. We could go into the city, but we did that yesterday, and by the time you drive into Manhattan, find a parking place, find a subway station, get to where you're going and get back to your car, its pretty exhausting. On tuesday we will have not only internet but also cable, but until then... I will be at the public library.
P.S. Jon- I got the invite for the 3 pimps site, but when I clicked it, it didnt work.. hmm....

Quick, Quick!
Quick (as the name may suggest) update. Rob got a sub job, we got an apartment. More importantly, we all ordered dessert after our dinner at a south african restaurant. I had cake, Sara had a strawberry tart. Rob saw what looked to be a chocolate turnover and ordered that. He took a bite and it turns out it was two hotdogs in a pastry. We laughed our butts off. Well, rob didn't, but...:)

Like Axel Rose said, "all we need (and the only thing we don't have) is just a little patience".

That song reminds me of Paul O'Brien from Ireland- my and lily's rooms were right next to his when we lived in the house and he had this tape single of Guns n' Roses with "Paradise City", "Sweet Child O' Mine" and "Patience" on it, and he would listen to it over and over and sing along to it.
So here we are. In Kalamazoo. Still. Yes, we were supposed to be in New York by now. By yesterday, actually. But we still dont even know if we have the apartment yet. We're just.. waiting. Waiting is not something that I do well. So I've been learning to pass the time with the following activities while waiting to get the phone call/email-
-going to Target and buying underwear
-watching Sex and the City. A lot of it. I'm starting season five now.
-whining
-going to the gym- I know that im about to have a breakdown, because usually I can talk myself out of going to the gym. But for the past few days my thought has been "well, what am I going to do instead, sit around here and wait for a call?" and the thought is actually depressing enough to get me off my ass and out the door.
-eating spaghetti. We haven't bought groceries in a long time because who the hell buys groceries right before they move? So we're trying to use what we have. Which is spaghetti. It's thursday and we've already had it twice this week.
-avoiding calling people. I am actually avoiding returning phone calls because I know that said person will ask me about the apartment and I think I might eventually have a meltdown if I continue to explain this retarded situation.
-watching television shows that make rob want to kill himself. Such as- The Ashlee Simpson Show, Last Comic Standing, Big Brother Season Bagillion. Strictly the best.
There's a good chance that by the next time I post I will have taken up a fun new hobby, like macromae, donating blood platelates, sedating myself. Something to pass the time...

"You Always Resort To Dinosaurs."
 
This is my favorite quote of the week, you can come up with so many stories about how that sentence would come about.  Here's how it really came about.  Rob asked me how much a friend of mine makes a year (wage-wise) and I told him, and then he says "Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to pry or anything."  This of course quickly escalated into nonsense.
me- "whatever, Richard PRYor."
rob- "Pryvate detective"
me- "I'm bringing you in on Pryor charges"
rob- "Lead actor in The Prying Game"
me- "Kentucky Pryed Chicken"
rob- "little white pry"
me- "Pryrannasauras Rex"
rob- "whatever, you always resort to dinosaurs."
Yup, telling you all this story in case you were curious how we were sitting around wasting our lives lately...

Rob and the I'm Mad At You Shirt

That would be a good children's book title, dont you think? So last night, we came home from the bar and I was kind of irritated with Rob because the night before we had this big conversation about how we should save money since we don't have a whole lot coming in right now and we're both going to be without jobs for the whole month of August. So then we go to the bar and Rob has FOUR freaking beers. To me, if you're trying to save money, have two beers and call it good. So anyhow, we go upstairs and I got on the computer and then I go into our room and Rob is wearing this ugly tanktop that I hate. As a brief digression, I don't think that ANY guy looks good in ANY type of tank top shirt, and Rob is well aware of this. He says "this is my "I'm Mad At You" shirt. Any time that I'm wearing this shirt you'll know that I'm mad at you." He then went on to explain that he wasn't taking the shirt off until I apologized. It was hilarious. All day he's been threatening to put the shirt back on. Cringe.

Where my girls at...

Pardon the corny title, I couldn't help myself. I MISS MY GIRL FRIENDS!! Here is what has happened in the past few months to the girls that I used to hang out with- Sara, my lived together for three years ate lots of TCBY watched dumb TV laughed at retarded things and wasted lots of time together friend, has been at camp since May and is moving out to NYC in a week. Erin C., my tuesday night girls night drink Sangria and watch American Idol friend, is living in Knoxville briefly on her way out to South Carolina. Tanya, my drink champagne at Epic friend, moved to Washington. Kenna has, in the three months since I saw her at my wedding, gotten engaged, married and moved to Florida. Jenn, though she hasn't lived in the same town as me for five years now, has moved out to Long Island. Jess is hanging out in D.C. doing Law School. I love to hang out with Jen D., but with different schedules and all we dont see each other more than once or twice a week, and that's with the boys around. I miss hanging out with girls! I miss talking about nothing in particular! I miss c0mplaining about things. Guys - Don't take offense to that, you know that I love you, but every one needs same gender friends. I'm wondering if my recent lack of girl friends has something to do with my sudden infatuation with Sex and the City. I never had an interest in the show until the girls I work with started talking about it. Now I'm almost through the third season. I love it! I want to meet friends for lunch in Manhattan and talk about bad sex and careers and men dressed as sandwiches making sexually explicit remarks when you walk by! I'm that girl now. Do you think that Sex and the City was kind of tailored so that everyone woman could kind of identify with one of the characters? I mean, not to say that every woman fits in one of those four catergories, but I think every one can find something they identify with in one of them. I love Miranda. I thought that I would like Carrie at first, seeing as she is a writer and all, but Miranda has this smart ass sarcastic humor that I love. I hate Charlotte. Please, no one see themselves in Charlotte, okay?

Shady, my friends, shady.
So I'm reading Newsweek last night waiting for a table to leave the restaurant- do you know where 50% of the funds for Nader's campaign is coming from? The Republican party. And now that I'm saying it, I'm thinking to myself, well of course, Republicans prop up Nader and try to take votes away from the Democrats, why didn't I think of that? I will tell you why I didn't think of that- because I am not evil and scheming. What the hell ever happened to two opponents giving their speeches and the best man wins? I for one, would not want to win something knowing that I didnt actually win, that I turned things around in my favor. Have you been approached by anyone asking you to sign a petition to put Nader on the ballot? According to Newsweek, these are also Republicans. Okay, giving money to another campaign to hurt your opponent, that's shady, but whatever. But actually posing as someone for Nader to get him on the ballot and tricking people interested in Nader into signing these petitions? YOU ARE FLAT OUT MISREPRESENTING YOURSELF!! I realize that a much stronger word is in order here, but all I can think of is RUDE!! Seriously, how can we put a party into office (or keep them there, rather) that has such underhanded tactics?!?! When you see something like that is it so hard to believe that weapons of mass destruction never existed? Grrr. I am becoming all political lately. The thing is, I'm not really political, I just REALLY REALLY don't like Bush.
Anyhow, onto other things- My apartment is in ruins. I started trying to pack things up, but really I'm just making one gigantic mess. The thing is, half of this stuff is going into a garage sale, but the garage sale is in Davison, so I can't do anything with it until I go home to Davison.
WHEN ARE WE GOING TO FIND OUT IF WE GOT THE APARTMENT OR NOT!??? I'll be packing up a box and feeling like I'm getting something done when all the sudden I'll think to myself "you know, we dont even for sure have an apartment to move all of this INTO right now.." and its like all of my work is useless...
And lastly but not leastly- Happy 22nd Birthday Jennifer D.!

Hmm.
So I'm listening to the light rock station today and that "havin' a party" song by Rod Stewart comes on. The lyrics, I noticed, are as follows
We're havin a party/dancing to the music/played by the DJ/on the radio/ Cokes are in the ice box/popcorn's on the table/
and im thinking to myself, Wow Rod, that sounds like a blast I'll be right over. Not that Im trying to say that you have to have alcohol to have fun but.. that sounds like Square's Night Out. Yes, I just said 'squares'. Im just that cool.

Disappointed.
Today I rented a movie that was supposed to be really good- it was called 'Elephant' and it was a Gus Van Sant movie. I really like Gus Van Sant. I cannot bring enough thanks to the man who brought Good Will Hunting into existance. What I may have learned though, is that I like Gus Van Sant the director, not the writer. The movie was basically about Columbine without actually saying it was about Columbine. The idea was show the daily life of several students leading up to the shooting. I have never seen a movie so devoid of emotion in my life. The characters said nothing that set them apart from any other stock high school character. While I realize that the idea was to show 'ordinary' students, the problem is that to get an audience involved in a character they have to feel some emotion for that character, whether it be love or hate. If you have a character who's entire conversation consists of "hey, whats up" "nothing, how about you?" "nothing, taking some pictures" "cool, see you man" and then he gets shot, its sad, but you're just not feeling it because you dont feel like that character is real. Even the shooters were apathetic, you just couldnt see their anger. I have a hard time believing that someone would shoot numerous people without having a serious amount of anger. Apathy breeds inactivity and a lack of caring about those around you, but I dont see it fueling a mass murder involving a plan that requires a serious amount of forethought. On a positive note, I thought that he did some really cool perspective things with it- Following a character and then going back to a moment that he/she interacted with another character and switching over and following a different person. Overall though, not what I was hoping. It's okay though Gus, I still love you for Good Will Hunting.

Funniest thing I've heard lately

Rob and I were driving home and there was this girl getting out of her car across the street from our house. She had that hair where it kind of flips up and its shorter, but hers seemed to be all gathered, so the flip came to a point. Rob shakes his head as if it's really too bad and says "she's got Anime-head."

Woes of the Recently UnInsured

So for grad school I have to have the traditional school physical done as well as a Measles/Mumps/Rubella vaccination. Up until May of this year, I had health insurance. So let me give you the heads up. Do you know how much a physical costs w/o insurance? First, lets recap on what a physical entails. Check the blood pressure, check the heart and breathing, check the reflexes, check the ears/nose/mouth, ask if there are any problems, sign a form. This five to ten minute procedure will run you a whopping $150. I'll leave it at that. No snide comments or bitter words, I think it speaks for itself.
Speaking of snide and bitter, there's a fair chance that those two words describe a lot of my posts lately, so I will try to put a little cheer into this post. I greatly enjoyed myself last night- rob and I went out for drinks with jen and ryan and had a great time talking and drinking a bit much (well, I did anyhow). I am excited about going to Blissfest next weekend. I mean really excited. I dont feel like I've been really excited about something in a while. I've been "excited but stressed" and "excited but to busy to think about it". I am just "excited really looking forward to this, think its going to be a fun vacation" excited. Its fourth of july weekend this weekend. Nothing at all planned.
Went to New York with my mom on Monday to look for apartments- we got a cute little studio apartment the size of a shoebox. I love it. Lots of windows, lots of light, bigger bathroom, bigger kitchen, HARDWOOD FLOORS, in a pretty good neighborhood, size of a shoebox. The only downside is that it's a co-op and they want all of this stuff with our application- last two years of tax returns and W-2's, 2 letters of rec for each person, a landlord letter, credit check, last two pay stubs, blood sample, CAT Scan, eye of newt, hair of a unicorn, our first born child. But I think it's worth it. Now, if one of my classes asks me to make a shoebox diarama of my house I can do it to scale.
Got to go to work.

Screw you, Carnie Wilson!

As I was driving home last night from the bar, I was a little depressed. The thing is, I'm only 23 frickin years old and it kind of feels like my whole life is flying by me. I wake up around 9ish in the morning- not too bad- and by the time I get up, eat, go work out, take a shower, have lunch and write for a little while, its time to go to work. Everyday this is what I do. And then a month passes and I go, what the hell, where did that go? And it's summer for God's sake, I should be out doing fun enjoyable things. The other day the waitress at a restaurant said "why aren't you out beach bumming" and I'm like, ha! yeah right, cause I have time for that. And I know I'm not the only one, everyone I know my age is doing the same thing- working like crazy to pay their way through school, grad school, film school or life in general until they either have a degree to get a job doing what they want to do AND make decent money or decide what it is they would like to do. BUT WE'RE FREAKING YOUNG!! doesnt it seem like this is the time when we should be out there doing things that we'll talk about when we're old because right now we have energy and there's a lot of time for possibility in our life because we've got sixty some years left. But we're all out there in grocery stores and restaurants and etc. freaking bored out of our minds ready to scream just trying to make due for the moment. And then, who comes on the radio but Carnie Wilson. Did you know that Wilson Phillips got back together? An unfortunate choice, as they remade "Turn, Turn, Turn" a fantastic song that is sacrilige to remake, but nonetheless. The DJ was talking to her and he's like, we'll, why did you guys break up in the first place? And Carnie's all like "Oh, because I wasn't walking into work everyday and loving what I do. I mean, I just wasn't feeling inspired. And I've always felt that you're vacation should be your vocation. So I just decided I wasnt going to do it anymore." You know what I'd like to say to you, Carnie Wilson? Screw you. You make ample amounts of money singing. Boo Hoo. Do you know how many garbage men there are in this country? do you think they feel inspired to go rid the world of garbage when they wake up? Why I understand what you're saying, that you should really love what you, there are so many people in the world who are just as worthy of a decent job, but dont have the option of quitting their million dollar singing career because they dont feel inspired everyday. Please refrain from coming on the radio in the future, after I have just finished work, and telling me that you took a decade off from singing because your vocation wasn't a vacation. BECAUSE I OFTEN FEEL THAT MY VOCATION IS A VACATION IN HELL.

Sick. Blah.

Eww. I am sick. Like, terribly sick. I puked my guts out last night. Today my ulcer hurts so bad from all of the stomach acid that I am only comfortable if I'm laying down or sitting up ridiculously straight, and even then every half hour or so a sharp pain will stab me directly in the back, causing me to squeeze something very tightly and breathe like Im in labor. No, its fun, seriously, come hang out with me, we'll have a blast.

Nothin's New....

I'll try and make this an exceptionally long post, as Rob is waiting to use the computer with the whining, hopping from one foot to the other, sighing impatience of a five year old. tee hee!
Today we did laundry- five loads of it. You know, everyone asks me "is it hard getting used to living with one another?" and Im like, no, its basically no different. You know what IS hard though? The way Rob folds clothes. I hate the way Rob folds clothes. To the point that I want to take the clothes of mine that he folded and refold them so I can get some sleep at night. Of course, I cant say or do any of this because that would make me a psycho. But I think of my poor t-shirts, folded with their sleeves together instead of my traditional sleeves folded behind the front, and it gives me a tiny tic.
I also hate Nextel today. My service hasn't even BEGUN with them and they already screwed something up. That something being ORDERING MY PHONES. So, if you're trying to get ahold of me or rob.. good luck with that. You'll have a better chance on Wednesday or Thursday.
Tonight they're showing Finding Nemo outside on the new Arcadia Festival site and we're bringing a blanket and sitting out to watch it.

Thoughts on the so-called "Continental" breakfast and Airport Sightings

Let me tell you how much I paid for breakfast yesterday morning. 6 Euros. That is roughly equivalant to $7.50 right now. So you're thinking, "no big deal, some nice pancakes or an omlette could be worth that" and I would agree with you. The problem however, is that this was the continental breakfast, consisting of a bowl of cereal, toast, juice and coffee. First things first-which part of that breakfast cost the restaurant $7.50? Was it the two slices of white bread? hmm..no, no, i dont think so. The juice? pretty sure no. OH! then it must have been the bowl of Rice Krispies. WHO THE HELL CHARGES THAT MUCH FOR CEREAL AND TOAST!?!? But really, lets get to the heart of my concerns- the title "continental breakfast". Where exactly did that come from? Is it because its the same breakfast no matter what continent you're on? Because I think that its false advertising. To me, the phrase "continental breakfast" makes me think "oh look at me! Im a breakfast as big as a continent!" or "this is the breakfast to keep you full if even if you're traveling across continents." The word "continental", to me, brings to mind a breakfast with a vast array of choices. I'll tell you what it doesnt bring to mind. Cereal and toast. I think that it should be called the "Light Breakfast" or, keeping with the landmass theme, "Alcatraz breakfast" or "really tiny piece of ice that broke off of the polar ice caps" breakfast. For god's sake, in the U.S. I could have gotten a big omelette with toast and fruit AND TIPPED THE WAITRESS for $7.50.
Interesting things spotted in various airports yesterday- A business man, wearing a suit jacket, dress shirt, tie, nice shoes and those dress socks pulled all the way to the top of his calves.. with pale yellow shorts. Hmm.
The mullet to end all mullets- All short in the front and on the sides.. and a mullet all the way down to his butt. You rock on, mullet man! dont you listen to anything anyone else says about it!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ROBERT JA-AMES
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUU.
love you:)

Hello Hello Hello!

Well, I had planned on updating at some point while I was here, but now its the last day and Im just getting to it.. oh well, here it is nonetheless...
What I have learned from the last 10 days is that my map-reading skills are shit. Seriously, no matter what, I read the mad, I think I'm going the right way.. and without fail I am going the complete opposite way that I want to go. The busdrivers are so nice to me here because they feel so sorry for me. It is 1:26 in the p.m. here, which means it took me just shy of 2 hours to find my hotel. Im an Eiget. On a positive note, I visited the Guinness Brewery today. It was incredible. I dont even like beer and it was incredible. And really, it could have been pretty boring, if you think about it, its basically an explanation on how their beer is made. But they made it so inventive and interesting. I would say it was now one of my top 3 favorite places in Ireland. And I bought some cool stuff there.
So a short trip itinerary-
Spent thursday night in Dublin- Lily and I stayed in this awesome room where two entire walls were windows overlooking the city- while this was cool for one night, it was slightly out of our price range. Also saw St. Stephens Green and more importantly, Harry Potter.
Friday- Went to Pheonix Park to the zoo, where animals dont seem to be caged up. Saw many adorable Irish children in their matching Catholic school uniforms. Saw one boy in particular who was creating a lot of trouble and wore glasses. Loved him instantly and considered stealing him.
Went to Maynooth where we met up with Pat, Paul and Martin and went out to some pubs in Dublin- afterwards ate "kabobs" at Paul's insistance that he could "Just MURRRder a kabob right now"
Saturday- headed down to Kinsale, stopped at the rock of Cashel on the way down. Kinsale turns out to be the cutest seaside town in the world. Went out to the pub again. Drank a lot of wine. Went to a nightclub.
Sunday- visited castles and forts and put our toes in the ocean. Went to the pub, where I drank coke, explaining to the boys that I'm American and my liver cant handle three days of heavy drinking.
Monday- went to Limerick to see Tomas and met his adorable son Dean. Went to a Calligh (okay, thats probably not the right spelling- its "Cay-lee" and its a traditional irish dance/music event)did NOT go to the pub.
Tuesday- went to Galway- saw the Cliffs of Moher on the way. Hung out. Saw a movie.
Wednesday- walked around Galway, bought a claddagh ring, got on a train for Tullamore. I love the train. Finished reading "Angels and Demons" by Dan Brown which I recommend for the good story line despite the cheesy writing. Started "White Teeth" by Zadie Smith which I HIGHLY recommend in all ways.
So thats that. Im going to the Dublin Writers Museam now.
JOE PARCELL- I can help you find a cheap place to live in New York (I think...) we have this student webboard for my college that has all these listings- I will write you when I get back if you could still use a hand...
I will see you all soon.

Sneak Preview
There is much to say about this weekend- about why I slept on a sopping wet sleeping bag, why I learned that Amelia of aviation fame's last name is actually spelled Earhart and not Airhart, and why we were confronted by the DNR after a bitter old man stomped away to tell on us. But I will discuss this at another time, when I dont have laundry to do, photocopies to make, groceries to buy, and suitcases to pack. But I will post my favorite quote for now...
"Hmm.. I wonder who liked S'mores more, Lewis or Clark." - Axel Anderson, contemplating life while making S'mores.

Life=Good
Things are looking up after my long, mind numbing winter in dual job hell. Tonight, I will work for the last time this week. Oh yes, thats right! I dont have to work on a Saturday! Tomorrow, after going to kickboxing in the morning (envisioning high school kids heads as the target of my fists of fury) (oh yeah, thats right, I said fists of fury)I'm going to drive to Lansing and meet up with la familia and see the wedding pictures. Then I'm going to drive back here, pack up the car, pack rob into the car and go to the campsite. There, I will spend my weekend laying on the beach, laying in my hammock, playing poker and having a cookout. Then I'll come home monday, go to work(s)on tuesday, pack up my crap and I'm off to Ireland for 10 days on wednesday. I'm kind of freaking out about this summer though, I think its going to go by so freaking fast. In the seven weeks between getting back from my trip and moving to NYC, Im going to (1) fly out to New York and pick out an apartment (2) hopefully go to BlissFest with Jen and Ryan (3) hopefully go on a real quick hiking trip (4) make a couple trips home for various things (5) work five days a week (6)work like hell on my writing. It seems like there is SOOOO much stuff to arrange before I move-
On another page-
Im thinking about becoming and ex-patriate. I had this table last night with this gay couple who come in all the time and I love, and the guy is like "we're trying to figure out where we could move to.. its kind of a scary time to live in this country.." and Im like, you know, you're totally right. We are 5 months away from electing this man who scares the hell out of me to another 4 years. They're talking about starting a draft back up to fight a war that I dont even believe in and happen to feel is based completely on lies. The country is completely ruining the environment with all of these "new laws" which actually allow more pollution. From reading "Daily Reason to dispatch Bush" on www.mcsweeneys.net, I've found out that Bush has tried to appoint men who support segregation and oppose homosexual rights to high offices. I think that the fear from the 9/11 attacks has begun a national pride that in most cases would be good, but is being manipulated and used to talk people into giving up rights for supposed "security" and supporting someone who doesnt deserve the support, but fuels the fear. So, where do you think I should go? Prague is nice. Id miss my family, I couldnt really move anywhere. GOOD GOD PEOPLE, PLEASE, PLEASE GO OUT AND VOTE IN NOVEMBER!!
On a positive note- I have to admit that it's great that I live in a country where I can write a post like this and not fear for my life. That really is the best thing in the world about the U.S.

YET AGAIN- WHERE DO I WORK or WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO?
Once again, overheard in my ISS classroom-
student 1: You're going to hell (to student 2)
student 2: I don't believe in hell, Im Jewish
student 1: Yeah, well, then you're going to Hannaukah.

WHERE DO I WORK? or WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO?
Overheard in my ISS classroom today: "Yeah, I just got a CD player in my car. My boyfriend just stole it for me last night."

Botox. Shudder.
Last night I had a nightmare about Botox-like substances. My sister and I were at this clinic that had something to do with beauty, but it wasn't like a spa, it was an actual doctor. Maybe a dermatologist. Anyhow, my sister went first and they had this little contraption that looked like a smooth piece of metal with two handles. They put it against her skin and squeezed the handles together and all the sudden this spike of metal an inch and a half long pops out and makes a hole in her head and the lady fills it with "aloe stuff to make the skin smooth and fat to get rid of wrinkles." So when it's my turn I tell the lady that she can do everything else, but theres no way shes putting a hole in my head and filling it. So she's like "OK". So she does everything else and then I get up to go and I'm walking away and she corners me and gets the aloe stuff on toothpicks. And I see it and its wierd and all, but Im thinking, Oh, toothpicks instead of that metal thing, that seems like a pretty good deal. So I proceed to let this woman shove toothpicks covered in aloe stuff and fat into my temples.

COUNTDOWN SAYS: 4 MORE DAYS

4 MORE FREAKING DAYS AND I'M NOT AN ISS TEACHER ANYMORE!! I went on a job interview yesterday, because I was thinking, I have seven weeks between the time I get back from Ireland and moving to New York, so I'm going to need something more than just waitressing at night. It was a secretarial position for Culligan Water. I will not do it, even if I get the job. Why? Because the man that would be my boss is ON FIRE for water. I mean like, "this is such an important position, Laura. You would be the face and voice of Culligan Water for all the customers that come in here. If we decide you're the right person, we're willing to wait until you get back on June 12th." Now, on one hand, its admirable that this man takes a job that would drive anyone else to suicide and makes it his passion. On the other hand, BUDDY,ITS JUST WATER! I could not wake up every day, even just for seven weeks, and pump myself up to go sell water. If people called me on the phone and said "my water was supposed to be here hours ago, where is it!?" I would not say "oh GOD! IM SO SORRY!" I would say "hey lady, I dont know if you know or not, but you're getting upset about WATER. Do you have a faucet? good, I think you'll live until the delivery gets there.." Also, I've noticed as of late that my ability to kiss ass is diminishing. People get upset about stupid s@#t, and normally I would, you know, try to make them feel better. Now I just kind of look at them funny.
In other news, I have a flower on my desk at work that the janitor gave me, probably three months ago (that's a whole other story..) At first it died. Then it molded. Did I throw it out then? No. Now, I've just noticed, its so far gone that even the mold has died and given up. The miracle of science and patience.
In other other news... CAMPING TRIP ALL WEEKEND. I love camping. Plus, we have about 10 people coming out to the site to hang out and stay. I have a bad feeling we may be kicked out of the park when we have 10 people sleeping in our 4 person site. Oh well, what can you do?

I know, I know, I dont post for six months at a time and then all the sudden Im doing several posts a day. But I just have to tell you about something thats been bothering me... Do you assign everything a personality the way that I do? It's not even a conscious thing, but to me the number 8 seems like a nice person. Maybe its because it has the smooth curves. Because, while 7 is my lucky number, to me it has a sneaky personality. Maybe the harsh edges?? But really, I mainly do it with cars and pop. For instance, Jessica Stoltz's car- to me, is an old woman who wears big hats. I think its because the back end is so long, it kind of reminds me of someone with a big butt. Rob's car is a 40 year old accountant. Doesn't it just kind of look small and modest? Jen's car is a cocky teenager. With pop, I feel like the different companies are families- example-
Pepsi-
pepsi is the dad, diet pepsi is the mom, dr. pepper is the uncle everyone loves but no one really sees very often, sierra mist is like the kid brother, and mountain dew is the rebellious teenager.
DOES ANYONE ELSE THINK LIKE THIS????

Depressing when you write a huge post and it somehow gets messed up and lost. Luckily, I have nothing but time at work to write a whole new one. The most incredibly exciting news of my life is that Lily bought a ticket yesterday and will now be coming to Ireland with me. The trip is going to be a thousand times better with her, because for some reason we seem to get ourselves into really hilarious situations when we're going together- Im so excited, I cant wait to get on the plane:) In honor of the Laura/Lily Ireland adventure, I will post some highlights from our last time in Ireland together.
* By far my favorite is the Christmas tree story- We're at the pub on campus and we down a few too many Smirnoff Ices. We decide, hey! It's December! we need a Christmas tree! Me, Lily, Tomas and Paul decide to borrow a tree from campus- we go to the rec center, uproot one of the smaller trees and carry it home, dodging behind houses and between windows with a six foot tree. When we get it home, we stick it in a bucket and decorate it with tin foil.
* Thanksgiving is another good story. We decide to make the boys a traditional Thanksgiving meal. We order a turkey weeks ahead of time and when we go to pick it up on Thanksgiving, the butcher says "oh yeah.. we dont have that. How about some roast beef?" We are pissed beyond belief and walk another two miles to the other butcher (a matter of principle, you dont buy from someone who screwed you over!) and buy chickens instead. We make dinner, the boys find it to be disgusting (the candied sweet potatoes, cant blame them..) but are rather polite about it. We also have a guest for Thanksgiving. Jill, a guest of mine from home, has invited some random American she met in Galway to stay with us for a few days IN MY HOUSE. We lock our doors and pray we're not killed in the middle of the night...
This is all for now, partly because as I write these, I realize, you kind of had to be there...
A FEW NOTES!!!!-
Congratulations to Erin Carriere, soon to be Mrs. Erin Armey, as of last week:)
Congratulations to Kenna Dawson, soon to be Mrs. Kenna Kirschner as of last week-ish
Congratulations to Joseph Soushumber Parcell, who's first feature-length film will be debuting at the Little Theatre this weekend- 8/9pm in Kalamazoo- be there.
Congratulations to Tanya Snider who moves all the way to Washington this week:( going to miss you.
Congratulations to Rob-a-roo, who has a gig tonight in Jackson playing all originals...
man, now I just want to congratulate everyone..
Congratulations to Jackie for saying damn the man in a conference she went to this weekend...
Congratulations to Jen D. for teaching her first class, in creative writing no less, this week...
Congratulations to Jessica Sprovtsoff who has just completed her first year of Law School...
Thats all for now...

My day.

Tonight we made pizza on our new pizza stone. The pizza was fantastic and the kitchen is covered in flour. We must have been successful. In other news, I began the huge overwhelming and intimidating project that will be my summer. So before I run off to New York and have every word of every story I've written carefully scrutinized, I have begun the task of building up my 'in progress' writing folder. Basically, I need to get some stories going so that I have work to show in workshops and they need to be well on their way. At the end of the two years I have to have a book-length collection of short stories to earn my MFA. Im thinking mine is going to center around the idea of family- mostly non-traditional. Today, I started a story about a video game maker who falls in love with a migrant worker. Yeah, Im not so sure how that one is going to pan out either, but I have to say that I definately believe no story is wasted- My most successful story to date was the result of a memoir piece that failed horribly.
So today it started. I think one of the reasons that its so difficult to write is that you're almost afraid to put pencil to paper until you feel like you have a really good idea. Its like I'm afraid that I'm going to ruin the concept by starting a story line that may dead-end. Or I'm afraid of starting a story and spending tons of time on it, and then finding out that it didnt work out and now I've wasted all this writing time when I should have been thinking of a new idea. Oh well, that is the writing process to a tee, I should probably get used to it now.
In random and insignificant news, I went for a run today that was wonderful, because instead of running to a spot and then turning around and running back to where I started, I had Rob drop me off at a spot 2.5 miles from our house and I ran back to the house. It was so nice to feel like I was running TO somewhere instead of in a big freaking circle. Rob wants to go to bed now. 'night :)
P.S. Jackie- I wouldnt have signed the damn paper, and I would have stood up and told that guy he was an ignorant piece of... and then you and I could have knocked him off the stage and started a petition that made narrow-mindedness a federal offense and EVERYONE would have signed it. Grrr...

I'M F-ING BLONDE, DAMNIT!!

So today I went to get my hair done- I've been looking forward to this for quite some time now, I was sick of my hair but I was waiting to get it cut until after the wedding. I even went to a nice place, which is rare for me, because I was getting a cut and blonde highlights. The hair gods are laughing at me. First of all, ALL OF MY HAIR HAS BEEN CHOPPED OFF. I asked for it to be an inch above my shoulders. It must be like, 3 inches above my shoulders. Secondly, I asked for blonde HIGHLIGHTS. I swear to you my whole freaking head is blonde. And its not even the same COLOR blonde- the bottom of my head where the dye was in longer is like WHITE and the top is a golden-y color.

So I'm Thinkin..

Really, shouldn't it be called 'conception control' instead of 'birth control'?

I need to call into work and claim a mental health day.

The State of Affairs

Last night, I went to turn on American Idol (i know, i know, blah blah blah, its my guilty pleasure, okay?) and who was on instead but President Bush. Of course, it annoyed the hell out of me and I screamed at my TV "YOURE MAKING ME MISS AMERICAN IDOL!" And then I felt bad. What kind of person would rather watch a ridiculous singing competition than listen to the what the leader of their country has to say about what was going on. And then I stopped feeling bad. If it were Clinton, I would have listened to it. If it was anyone but Bush, I would probably would have listened to it. Its just that I have no faith in the man, I think he's sneaky, I dont think that he's qualified to be president, and I think that there are many things that he has not been truthful about. So yes, this is what it comes down to. I have more interest in weather or not that red-headed kid is going to get kicked off of American Idol than I do in listening to Bush's spin on things. Sue me.

Why I will never EVER have and utilities through SBC Ameritech again

On Sunday, Jon called and said "why is your phone disconnected?". Or maybe he asked Rob, and Rob asked me. Regardless, I was not aware that my phone was not working. Then I thought about it, and my DSL wasn't working, but I hadn't thought anything of that because our DSL seems to be constantly messed up. So yesterday I call SBC to find out what the deal is. Let me give you a little background info first. Im moving out of my apartment in 2 and a half weeks, so I called SBC last Monday to tell them I wanted everything shut off on April 24th. The lady I talked to that time was incredibly nice and even though I was on the phone for a half hour with her, mostly on hold, it was okay because she was making sure that I wouldn't default on my year long contract if I disconnected on April 24th. So she says everything is fine, and I hang up.
Now, back to yesterday. I call the lady, and she says that service was cancelled on March 24th, per customer request. I tell her that, no, it was supposed to be April 24th, the other lady must have made a typo. Do you KNOW what she said to me??? "Well, we disconnected that last wednesday. Why are you just now calling?"
UM, EXCUSE ME??? Oh, you're right, I should have noticed earlier, my fault. What the hell does it matter why Im just now calling? So then, she says to me "Well, I cant just hook the phone back up because you had a year long contract that ended in April, and since it was cut off in March you have to pay an early termination fee." ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! DO YOU HEAR WHAT YOURE SAYING??? YOU'RE the one who cut it off!! you made the mistake!! So I freaked out on her, and she has her manager take the fee off. But does it end there? No, of course it doesnt. This whole situation is too asinine to end there. Then, she tells me that she cant hook the phone back up, because in order to start the phone, Ill need to sign another one year contract. Yeah, because thats going to happen. To make a long story short, the problem was fixed freaking 45 minutes later, when I arrived to work unshowered, because it took me that long to explain to the woman that I wouldnt be signing or paying anything and that she would be hooking my service back up. Absolutely, without question, the worst customer service I have ever received. And the phone wont even be back on until tomorrow, and the DSL wont be back for anothe two days. GET REAL.

If your curious what a drunk email from jon might look like...

here is the answer to all of your questions...

Lola. I love you. And you love my hair. Right now you are talking
with a pseudo-german accent, trying to be like a hairstyleist.... you
are not an east-german hair-styleist. I am really really drunk. maybe
you should cut my hair, i am under the assumption that you are not
going to cut my hair. you are instead going to give me the side pony
tail. for fucks sake. side ponytails are a female thing. really. if i
don't have a vagina i really shouldn't have a side ponytail....and now
you are laughing at me... fuck. now you are getting a camera.... and
my girlfriend is saying that i'm cute... i dont' buy it...
unless .,... fuck yoiu... i don't want my picture taken.... fuck. my
picutre was taken. damnit. and people are downstairs smoking. i want
to smoke, but i shouldn't. now i can hear rob... i'm going to go find
out what kind of madness is going on downstairs... buy... or bye....
whatever... oh, my girlfriend is scratching my back... mmmmmmmm....
ohb yeah......


this is jo. jon's a ittle sleepy. e


NO I'M NOT!!!!!

Details for Joe

This post if specifically for Joe. So if youre not Joe than MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. The details of grad school are as follows- I believe I will be attending the MFA program at Sarah Lawrence in the fall. I say believe because while this is my number one choice, I havent gotten the results back from all my schools yet- So far Ive been accepted to Colorado, Pittsburgh and Sarah Lawrence. We would be living on the outskirts of NYC, and its a two year program, so we would move back to Michigan after I finished it. It would be particularly sweet because McSweeneys has an NYC office, and I could attempt to get an internship there while I was at SLC. This is all the info I have for you at this time. The bachelor/bachelorette parties are April 17th- are you coming??
miss ya:) Lola

Sorry, those are old posts, but I wrote them at work, and for some reason they wont publish there...

If you see my head bulging in odd places, it's because my head's about to explode. It. is humanly impossible to have this much to do and get it all done. The problem is this- well, I got into grad school in New York, which is great. But where is Rob going to work? So I got on the NY Dept of Ed today- to be certified he has to take this test- and he has to go to NY to take it. Cool. Also, even if he takes the test, theres no guarantee that he'll find a job, and what is he going to do if he doesnt have a job. Freaking education. Why doesnt the federal govt just have one big teaching requirement, so that way you can go anywhere and teach. So I found this Urban Teaching initiative thing that he could do, but there are all these catches and once again, its not like you can just count on him getting in, because what if he doesnt? Im going to be in school full time, not a whole lot of time for me to work, and if I did, Im a freaking creative writer, what the hell job am I going to get? Oh, and then I say to myself, well Laura, why dont you worry about all of that later, because youre getting MARRIED in six freaking weeks, and I have TONS left to do for that. And while we're on the subject, where am I going to work this summer? and where is rob going to work this summer? and is Lily going to be able to come to Ireland, or am I roaming around there for 10 days by myself? And what if I dont get enough financial aid from SLC, how am I going to pay for my education??? And should we get insurance for the summer? Because I get insurance from SLC, but what if something happens this summer? And somehow I ran out of contacts- am I going to have to pay for those myself? And my glasses are the wrong prescription now- can I get new ones or did I have to do that at the same time I got my contacts? And the front right side of my car looks like its about to fall off. And are we going to be able to go to Martha's Vineyard in August? Or are we going to have to spend all the honeymoon money going back and forth between here and new york, taking tests and looking at apartments for the fall. Dont ask me whats on my mind...

Mystery Solved and "Yes, my foot fits nicely in my mouth, thank you."

First of all, the previous post was actually written yesterday- I was writing on my crappy lap top that I use in the ISS room and the only graphic that popped up was the avocado. Today, one of the teachers was sick, so I'm subbing instead of doing ISS and Im using an actual computer, and VOILA! all my fruit is at the top of the page. Mystery solved. But I thought it was kind of a funny post and decided to post it anyways...

On another note, I had an interview for the ISS position this morning (yes, for the job I already have. Because of some type of union stuff they have to interview me as some kind of formality before actually hiring me. You'll be happy to know that I landed the job I've been working at for a month and a half.) But we did the interview thing (kind of..) and then me and the vice principal were talking about some of the kids that end up in ISS. You know, I dont back down on my statement that a lot of those kids just act like complete jerks. But the truth is, I have no idea what it's like to be in their place. Let's face it, I am a middle class white girl. And while I am proud of, and make a big deal about, the fact that I pay for everything including my college by myself and I have worked since I was 14, the truth is I am priviledged. I always had a nice, warm comfortable house to come home to. My parents are still married. Not only did my parents never do any type of drug, there wasn't even alcohol in my house when I was growing up. I was given a car for my last two years of high school. I have never ever, as far as I can recall, been hit by my parents in any way.
The vice principal was telling me about how she doesnt even suspend some kids because she knows that they'll get the shit beat out of them at home if she does. When I have kids in ISS, without fail, at least one of them has a parent in jail. I dont think I even know anyone who's parents were in jail. And while I dont feel that all of this makes me snobby or uncaring about their lives, nor do I feel that it validates their misbehavior, the truth is I dont know what its like to be in that position.

Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

You know, I could be wrong, but I swear my blog used to have more than just an avocado at the top. I swear there was like, an orange or some cherries or something up there too. Maybe, since I haven't been blogging nearly as much, they started to take some of my fruits away. And left me with an avocado, because they know that I dont like avocados. It's like the ultiimate insult from blogger.com. Or maybe it's like a five-star rating. This is the third day in a row that I've written, maybe I will get an orange back.

What the hell am I going to do with my life?

So, the results are slowly coming back from grad schools- of the seven I applied to- I'm on the wait list for the one I really want and I've been denied admission to two. Now the two that I didnt get into, I can honestly say I'm not too upset about- one was the number one program in the country- i wasnt even going to apply to it, but then my professor told me to. The other was a school that kind of specializes in offbeat, experimental writing, which doesnt necessarily fit my writing. Nonetheless, when you say "Next year, Im going to move to wherever I get into grad school" and then you get letters in your mailbox that say "Nope, can't come here", you naturally start to wonder to yourself WHERE THE HELL AM I GOING TO LIVE?? WHAT IF I DONT GET IN ANYWHERE? Because, I hate to say it, but I dont think I can stay here. I love Kazoo, but I have just been here for too long, and its time to get going. I'm 23 and I still live smack in the middle of one of the largest student areas where everyone is 19/20 and I hear people outside my window at night yelling drunken nonsense and I think to myself YOURE AN IDIOT. But really, they're not. Well, they are, but not in that sense- I mean, I did the same thing the first couple years of college, but now...you know. It's kind of like in kindergarten. I went to this school for kindergarten where we had a pizza party every friday followed by swimming lessons at the country club- There were three levels, and I tested into the advanced swimming class, but my best friend (Megan Bennett) tested into the intermediate. So I said I wanted to stay in intermediate. So I went there, and they were like, learning to float on their backs, and I was all like, come on people, who cant float on their back? and I was all bored and irritated with the people around me because I SHOULDNT HAVE BEEN THERE. See what I mean? Does that sound bad? Because what I mean to say is, everyone had to learn to float on their back, and you know, its okay if youre plugging your nose while youre going underwater. But once you've learned to swim without plugging your nose, you need to move to the advanced swimming class, because after a while, you're looking around going WHY ARE YOU HOLDING YOUR NOSE?? IF YOU JUST BREATHE OUT, THE WATER WONT GET IN. And if everyone around you starts to seem wierd, you're probably the one who's in the wrong place.
Four schools left to hear from. Pray for me.

Is it wrong that I hate a lot of the kids in my ISS room as much as I do? The thing is, so many of these kids act like such assholes. I realize also that I just see the bad kids- I subbed last week instead of doing ISS and the kids were really nice. But I seriously worry about the future of the world when I have these kids in my class who just dont give a crap about anyone or anything but themselves. And then you meet their parents and you realize where they got it from.

Several Things....

First, I'd like to start a profile series called "Spotlight On..."
The first Spotlight will be a study of the "number collector"

Number Collector-
What is he DOING with all those numbers??? He's someone I barely know, I would have walked by without saying hello if I had my anti-social way. We worked on some project together, like YEARS ago. We talk for four or five minutes after which I would be more than happy to leave, but inevitably (sp?) there is the "Oh, let me get your number, we should hang out some time" AM I REALLY BITCHY? because all i can think is "you KNOW we arent going to hang out." Maybe its because I'm not the most of gregarious of people, maybe he really does think we should hang out some time. What do I think is really going to happen though? I think I'm going to get drunk dialed some time in the near future and hear "who is this?? you were in my phone" Speaking of which, how many numbers can those phones hold??

In other news- I had a dream last night in which I defended Jen's honor. Rob and I meet up with Jon and we all go to meet up with Jen and Ryan. Just before we get in the apartment though, Jon says "well, you know ryan is seeing someone else, right?" and I'm like "Ryan and Jen broke up?!?!?" and Jon's like "No, Ryan's just seeing another girl too." So we go in and get ready and I'm like "are you ready Jen?" and shes like "Oh, I'm not going Lola" and Ryan's like "Oh, [insert 'other girls' name that i cant remember'] is going to come with us." Then I got really pissed off at the boys and I turned around and said "Well, I hope you guys realize I am NOT being nice to her." Ha. Ive got your back Jen:)

In other other news-
Rob did something cute today. I had this student who was asking how the Cold War started, and for the life of me, I could not remember- so I told him about the Space Race and McCarthyism and the Red Scare and all that- and then Rob came in my room and I'm like "Rob, could you explain to him how the Cold War started?" Well, it turns out that Rob knows everything there is to know about the Cold War and he just went off and explained everything about it. It was hot. Am I a nerd? Im glad I dont have a place where people can post comments. :)

1. What did you do in 2003 that you'd never done before?
Turned 22, visited St. Louis and looked out the windows at the top of the Arch, tried on a wedding dress, called the police on my baby brother, rafted down a river drunk, hated Shakespeare with the hate of a thousand angry wildebeasts, wrote a story about sex, took dancing classes with Debbie the fringe-wearing fool

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
If I made resolutions I have no idea what they were- but maybe I accomplished them and I just dont know it because I cant remember what they were...

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Not close to me, but a friend from high school had a baby

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My stepgrandpa. This was very sad, it was the second husband of my nana, the coolest person in the world. Can you even imagine losing TWO husbands??

5. What countries did you visit?
Just the boring old US this year- I didnt even go to Canada!

6. What would you like to have in 2004 that you lacked in 2003?
Maybe a real job? No, thats not true, I dont want a job. An absence of debt? A book deal? A shopping spree in target? No, no. A hammock. All I want in the world is a hammock.

7. What date from 2003 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I cant think of a single one. Wow, boring year.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I won a creative writing award- i was pretty proud of myself for that. I also had one of my photographs accepted into an art show..

9. What was your biggest failure?
Despite my five month plan, I have failed to pay off my credit card bill.
But hey, if youre going to fail, fail miserably, and that I did.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I was in Meijer a month ago and I reached for the Hawaiian Punch Fruit Juicy Orange and stubbed my finger on the metal shelf. it still hurts sometimes.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I have to go with Johanna on this one- I bought a damn good pair of jeans that never EVER make me feel fat when I put them on. Also- A Jack Johnson CD, A green square purse, Valpraiso Sheeps Milk Feta Cheese, and a candle chandelier from Goodwill for $5

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Justin Timberlake's when he hosted Saturday Night Live

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
if only I had the guts to say such things..

14. Where did most of your money go?
Food! have you ever met anyone who loved to eat out so much? BAD!! badbadbadbadbad. Also, to application fees for graduate schools.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
?? Ill have to think this over and reenter it .

16. What song will always remind you of 2003?
Ignition Remix- R. Kelly

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder?happier, with myself in general
ii. thinner or fatter? thesame, despite the fact that I spend obscene amounts of time at the gym
iii. richer or poorer? maybe a little richer?? but more debt. maybe the same.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
spent more time in the photo lab, drove around more in summer.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
work.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Driving between Kalamazoo and Davison three times during Christmas week.

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
My sister. who calls me at 7am.

22. Did you fall in love in 2003?
Oh, I was already in love.

23. How many one-night stands?
None- but I have one more night here, lets see what I can do. I KID! I KID!

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Will and Grace- and Rich Girls

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Not really- I hated you all last year too. KIDDING!

26. What was the best book you read?
re-reading Catcher in the Rye, I'm reading the Lord of the Rings trilogy right now and Im rather enjoying it. I started East of Eden and it is damn good, though I havent finished it. And I like the Nanny Diaries.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I love Pearl Jam this year.

28. What did you want and get?
lots of stuff

29. What did you want and not get?
a banana holder

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
"Love Actually"

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 22, and I cried and told Rob that no one loved me.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A hammock

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
I would describe it as irritating to my roommate. She is a fashion diva. I wear sweatpants with paint stains on them. If I could care less about clothes, I dont know how.

34. What kept you sane?
Rob speaking in Kermit voice.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I have a middle school crush on Ashton Kutcher. And Colin Firth. And the lead singer of Coldplay, based solely on his lyrics. And Jack Johnson.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
This idiodic (sp?) rep from Portage who thinks that all the colleges that receive state funding should turn in a list of the classes they teach and the government should be able to veto classes they dont think are appropriate. Im still seething. This alone makes me realize why Pink Floyd wrote "brick in the wall"

37. Who did you miss?
Lily, my Irish Boys, Ireland in general, Jessica Sprovtsoff

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Well, I knew them before, but I got to know Jen and Ryan a lot better this year. And now I love them. Love love love love love.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003:
still thinking...

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"I get by with a little help from my friends..."

What in the world is causing me to, after almost four months of not writing anything, to write two days in a row? *sigh*
This will be a meditation on my anti-socialness. The fact of the matter is, I just dont want to make the effort to talk to people sometimes. OK, most of the time. Doesnt that sound awful?? Now this does not go for people that I am well aquainted with, but thats only because if I dont WANT to talk I dont HAVE to. I would really rather just either sit around and do something by myself or sit around with people I know and discuss inconsequencial (sp?) matters. If you are a small-talk maker I will avoid you like the freaking plague. But it isnt that I dont want to hear other people talk. I have no problem listening to people forever, but I dont want to uphold my end of the conversation, I really just find it to be way to much work sometimes.

WHY OH WHY is the counter girl at TCBY always rude to me? I just dont get it. Ive never said more than "hi" "chocolate in a waffle cone" and "thanks" to her. I walk in and theres no "hi, how are you", not even a "what can I get for you today" You know what she says to me the minute I walk up to the counter? "Do you know what you want?" Rudeness! Am I inherently bitchy and just dont know it? Am I unknowingly rude?

Idiocracy.

I spent all of last night acting like an idiot. No more alcohol for me, as it seems I am incapable of realizing my limits as far as that is concerned. After talking to many many people and calling all of them the wrong names, puking in front of Blockbuster and letting Jon and Garren in on some of the finer points of my love life, I believe that me and alcohol will now have to sever our relationship.

Wednesday Fight Night

You know, I cant help but notice.. you know what the whole Bush speaks/ Saddam speaks thing reminds me of? You know at the beginning of WWF where the two people get up and talk shit about each other before they go fight? It isnt far off... Bush says Saddam is a ruthless dictator, Saddam calls him "evil, little Bush"... DING DING DING!

HOLY SHIT, ITS AN UPDATE!

After a month and a half on blogger sabbatical, I have indeed returned, though I cannot make any promises as to how long I will return for. Winter is shitty. Everything is cold and wet and varying shades of gray. 'gray' or 'grey'? hmm.. ill have to look. Everyday I say, dear God, how long until Spring. Spring is by far the superior season, due largely to the fact that there is green everywhere, I can go out without a coat, but its not so hot that after driving around my back is soaked with sweat. anyhow. yay for spring. hurry the hell up. Id like to introduce a little quiz here. Its called "Are You a Nazi?" If you answer 'yes' to any of the following questions, you are indeed a Nazi.

ARE YOU A NAZI?
1. Did you give me a parking ticket today after seeing me park illegally and then waiting for me to walk away so you could scurry over with your little pad of tickets? Congratulations, you are a Nazi.
2. Did you tell me that I cannot walk in the April graduation ceremony because I have ONE ONLINE class left to take? You too are a part of the Third Reich.

Seriously, you know what my biggest pet peeve in the world is? People who dont pull over to the side of the road when emergency vehicles are coming through. Could there possibly be anything more self-absorbed? Its like "oh, I realize that someone is about to die, but Im just really in too much of a hurry to pull over, sorry."
Bedtime.. and tomorrow, more updates? perhaps, perhaps.

After viewing the second Lord of the Rings, a.k.a. the Two Towers, and some careful consideration, Rob and I have both determined that if we had to be any Middle Earth character, we would both like to be elves.

I hate everything. Have a nice night.

"Because the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn burn burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centrelight pop and everybody goes "Awww!".
- Jack Kerouac from "On The Road"

Whole world= meanies

Do you want to know what I think?
THEN GET OFF MY SITE!
ha:) nah, just kiddin
I think that no one in the world does something nice for anyone anymore. Everyone is self-absorbed. Seriously, no one goes out of their way for someone else or just tries to do something to help someone out for the sheer fact that it will make their day. Im not saying im any better, Im sure I do the same thing, but I think everyone needs to stop. Everyone goes about their day and cant do anything to help anyone out or think of anyone else, because they're so busy with their own lives... Well guess what, in another 40 years you're going to be an old retired person and no one is going to give a shit if you finished the last chapter of your economics book or whatever, and you totally missed your chance to make someones life better and no one is going to have time for you just like you didnt have any time for them.Go figure out something really nice that you can do for two people, right now. I dont care, go buy them a Krispy Kreme donut or something, Sweetwaters is open 24 hours. If you have to go out of your way to do it or inconvienience yourself .. EVEN BETTER.
GO. NOW. STOP READING THIS.

BLAH

Wednesday.
*sigh* I just had a wine cooler and it relaxed about 90% of my stressed out muscles. Nice.
Im about to show the pictures I took to the family that hired me to do their family picture, so hopefully they'll like them. Im really happy with them, actually, I think they look pretty good.
Today in American Lit we were talking about this piece of writing and the professor was explaining that what the author was trying to say was that people corrupt their minds with total crap media and tv and how the the mind is supposed to be a sacred place for thought. Now, while im not sure that I agree to that degree,... I still feel bad for watching the Real World last night (ooooh! they think Trishelle has an eating disorder!!... I mean... nevermind.)
The countdown has begun!! 3 more Geos labs and I am free forever of the hell that is rocks.
I am in love with Dr. Mario and my Nintendo is broken. This is the worst kind of torture. Okay, not the WORST, but you know...
I 'borrowed' the John Mayer CD from the darkroom to make some copies, and I think its a really really good CD. I must admit, in the beginning, I was not a John Mayer fan, I totally made fun of that song which I now like.. but i have turned over a new leaf!!
Rob is making me Indian Chicken Curry for dinner. Yum. I have been looking forward to this all day.

A few more points of note..
*Tomorrow is Halloween! yeah, thats not actually that exciting. Rob and I are going to my house (home home, not apartment home), originally we were going to take my niece trick-or-treating, but no longer, now we are just handing out candy. But we will make them work for their candy, oh yes, there will be no easy getting-of-the-candy from me, nor from Rob (but this is not unusal, you dont get anything out of Rob without a fight)... there will be much recitation from the kids. The Declaration of Independence, The Gettysburg Address, Indecipherable Pearl Jam Lyrics, possibly "The Raven".... no child will leave with a treat without some intellectual collateral...
*Secondly, the deadline for the Laureate is Friday, so get your stuff in, or else. Up until today, we had a total of 8 submissions, and then we went in today and all the sudden we had 43 submissions. This is a gigantic relief. I was considering submitting pieces under pen names just to fill the damn thing up, but no longer necessary...
*Third, a small internal battle. I consider myself to be at least reasonably intelligent. Im opinionated, I do my best to read a lot, be up to date on things. So why, in total antithesis to this, do I have an unsatiated love for trashy television?? Now I dont watch television often, but when I do, do you know what I watch? Well here is a little rundown on this weeks television watching schedule for you...
Monday night... joined my roommate for a little viewing of "P. Diddy, MTV's making of the band"
Tuesday night... The Real World, in which one cast member starts a career as a Go Go Dancer, and the another has a one night stand with a girl in the community hot tub.
Currently I am on my way over to a friends house to watch The Bachelor. Trash! Complete Trash! And I relish every moment of it...
*Fourth- My term paper for American Lit is "Who do you think (pick an author) has answered the call to create a writing style/novel/attitude that is unique to the American Experience?" any ideas?? let me know... right now Im thinking Salinger
*Fifth- my roommate has abandoned me, Its 9 pm and I cant find her anywhere. SARA! WHERE ARE YOU?!? COME BACK, ILL BE BETTER, I PROMISE!!! :)
*Sixth- A nice quote, and goodnight all...
"Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker"- Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

Its almost Christmas!
Yeah, okay, thats a lie...
Me and Sara are putting up our Christmas tree next friday (we feel that anything after Halloween could reasonably be considered the Christmas season...) Seriously though, although I completely love fall, there is a bit of a lack of things to look forward to in the September/October months. Finally at the END of October you get Halloween, but that isnt terribly exciting. Then you get Thanksgiving which I love, and Christmas, but usually Im in a pretty positive mood for most of those two months because you put up decorations and it snows and you listen to Christmas music and make cookies and go home and see your family and its actually almost sad when you actually get to Christmas, because the season is more fun than the actual day. And two weeks after Christmas is my birthday, which is good, except that ill be 22 and that will make me feel unbelievably old.
In case you havent noticed, I have a bit of a lack of things to talk about lately, so im skipping from topic to topic.
The soup at work tonight was Spicy Thai Peanut and it was UNBELIEVABLYgood, so ive been looking for a recipie for it online. If you have a recipie for Spicy Thai Peanut soup, please send that my way.
Rob is working late and I was trying to wait up for him but its only 1:30, and he probably wont be here till 3. He is the cutest boy alive. We're carving pumpkins tomorrow. Im going to get a tiny little one for Me and Sara's cat (Catboy) and Im going to carve a little cat face into it. Then again, he's a psycho cat and he'll probably gnaw the entire face off of the pumpkin the minute Im not looking...
I can recognize my rambling when I see it, I will stop posting now... but on a final note, a great quote from the book Im reading right now-
"There are years that ask questions and years that answer."- Zora Neale Hurston

Nothing To Post...

WHAT AM I GOING TO BE FOR HALLOWEEN?!?!
Had some milk supersaturated with Hershey's Chocolate syrup with my lunch.
Reading "Their Eyes Were Watching God".. its really good...
my niece is going to be a ladybug for Halloween.
Have geology lab in approximately 1 hour 10 min.
Currently dont give a f@#* about rocks.
Hate my neighbors because they stole our doormat. Must be nice being ghetto-fabulous, Ill have to ask them about it.
Tennis Shoes are falling apart, could be hazardous, good reason not to workout (beyond my control, obviously a sign from God.)
I dont know how and I dont know when, but Im certain that someday my unhealthy obsession with cheese will lead to my downfall.
Missed the lastest episode of the soft-porn season of Real World last night. Bummer.
Thats all I got kids.

Choice.
You know what I love? Weekend Update on SNL. I think Tina Faye and Jimmy Fallon, especially together, are quite possibly the funniest thing ever.

Trees

So about my sweet Counting Crows concert last night. They have these causes that they try to endorse, and in every town they go to they invite an organization thats related to that cause (i.e., domestic violence, the environment) to hand out info in the lobby. So Adam gets up there and hes announcing that some kind of Detroit Tree-Planting group is out in the lobby and hes like "Yeah, go check them out cause, lets face it, your city could use some fuckin trees"
funniest ever.
in honor of a really good concert, tonights quote will be from them.. this is from "Up All Night" off of their new CD. In some odd offbeat way, I find it to be really romantic..:)
"Fix you're hair just right, put your jeans on tight
Wear a dress so I can get it off real easy.
Cause Ive been thinkin I'd
Like to see your eyes
Open up real wide
The minute that you see me...." -Counting Crows

Monday Morning

I was home (like, home home, parents home) Sunday and I set the alarm, and when it went off Monday morning, I totally wasnt used to it and it scared the hell out of me and I fell out of bed. At this point in time I am sitting on the floor and I realize that I had slept with one leg over the other, so one of my legs was completely asleep, so I couldnt get up, I had to wait for my leg to wake up. If you could have seen me sitting there on the floor, unable to get up after falling out of bed.. I swear to you, it was the most pathetic image ever.

A Couple Things of Note
After my insistant scramble to get tickets to the only Counting Crows show that they are playing in Michigan, they add another show in East Lansing. *sigh*
I took this test last week in my US 1940-1960 history class. I got done with the test and was literally laughing as I told someone how badly I bombed it. See, the thing was, it was completely my fault, because I didnt get around to reading 300 of the 400 pages of the reading that the test was over. Usually, Im a pretty good BS'er, but this time, I didnt even know enough to BS. And you know what I got on this test? Freaking 82%. I dont deserve anywhere near that. Its not because I did a good job of BSing, I think this guy just got sick of reading essays and gave me a good grade. For example, I will include a short essay.
the question was "What was the controversey surrounding the use of the Atomic Bomb in World War II?"
This is my answer, verbatim, off of my test paper that was handed back-
"The atomic bomb controversey was centered around the complete destruction it would cause. O'Neill understands the complete horror that it caused, the reason he named the last chapters of his book 'Reckoning.' I believe O'Neill saw this as a very final and thorough end to the war, however. Much of America was torn between these two points in relation to the A-bomb."
Now, when I read that, it is very VERY apparent to me that I havent read the book. Do you know what I got for that little gem of knowledge? 9 out of 12 points.
And lastly, I heard this on the news this morning. So theres this family in Georgia (?), and on Sunday they get in their car with their son to go to church, and as they're pulling out of the driveway, their entire house blows up in front of them. I guess it was some kind of gas leak. Can you even imagine? What if they decided that they were too tired to go to church that morning? unreal.

My Pathetic Financial State
I just went to pick up toilet paper, 3 potatoes, and I saw grapes, and I love grapes, so Im like, sweet, grapes, picked those up. It came to $5.99. I had $5.60 to my name. I had to put the grapes back.

"To live in this world
you must be able
to do three things:
to love what is mortal;
to hold it
against your bones knowing
your own life depends on it;
and, when the time comes to let it go,
to let it go."
-Mary Oliver from "In Blackwater Woods"

Nice

It's nice to have a job that you like. Its nice to have a job that, for the first time for as long as I can remember, I dont dread going to every time. Its nice to have a job that I have fun at. Nice.
Rob, for our 3 year anniversary, or for the next special occasion that comes along, we should go out for dinner and by a bottle of wine. There is something romantic about drinking out of wine glasses, I think. "But Lola", you're thinking, "you hate wine." Yes, I thought of that too. But there is the perfect solution. Riesling. Its the wine equivelant of frufru drinks. It actually kind of tastes like wine coolers. And its not expensive at all, maybe $20 for the bottle...

"The earth is so small and so fragile and such a precious little spot in the universe that you can block it out with your thumb, and you realize that on that small spot, that little blue and white thing, is everything that means anything to you- all of history and music and poetry and art and death and birth and love."- anonymous

To Dorothy
by Marvin Bell

You are not beautiful, exactly.
You are beautiful, inexactly.
You let the weed grow by the mulberry
And the mulberry grow by the house.
So close, in the personal quiet
of a windy night, it brushes the wall
And sweeps away the day till we sleep.

A child said it and it seemed true:
'Things that are lost are all equal'
But it isn't true. If I lost you,
The air wouldn't move, nor the tree grow.
Someone would pull the weed, my flower.
The quiet wouldn't be yours. If I lost you,
I'd have to ask the grass to let me sleep.

What, pray tell, is the internal atom structure of Quartz? or WHO THE HELL CARES

I'm pissed. I took my first geology test today. Let me preface this by saying that, I know I suck at science, and so I read and took notes on EVERY SINGLE WORD in EVERY CHAPTER for this test. I even did those review questions at the end of the chapter. Needless to say, this is FAR more effort than I usually put into a class. Do you know what this man asked me on the test? SEVERAL questions were as follows
"What is the internal atom structure of Quartz", feldspar, blah blah blah.
140 pages of geological stuff and you think im going to remember the fricking internal atom structure of ONE SPECIFIC MINERAL? lets get real. I know how volcanoes form, I know what a ferromagnesian mineral is, I know all about the Ring of Fire. But oh no, you dont want to ask me about those. You want to know what shape little particles I CANT EVEN SEE are in, in one in FIVE MILLION DIFFERENT TYPES OF ROCKS. Man, you suck.

One-Upped

So I make this 80's post, which Jon countered. Every one of those things you listed I could ignore, like, yah that was good, but not worthy of a decade. Except. Then you brought the A-Team into it. Ouch. God that was a great freakin show. Im humming the theme music as I type this. You did forger MacGuyver though.. that was sweet too. So my post is this.. I amend my statement to say "The vast majority of media (music, television, etc.) that came out of the 80's was obnoxious and embarrassing.. But then theres the A-Team." Oh. And yes, Robaroo's birth was also good..:) He was born June 8th, which makes his conception in 1979 though.. (just cause you were wondering, Jon)

Ha. :)

Me and my roommate were going through MP3's tonight listening to songs that were popular way back when we were in high school. Do you remember that song "Freak Me" by Silk?
Here is the first lyric.
"Baby don't you understand
I want to be your nasty man."
Ha! hahahahahaha
I dont even need to make a comment, that one speaks for itself...

Declaration.

I stand by my assertation that The Breakfast Club was the only worthwhile thing to come out of the 80's, and without it the entire decade could be wiped out. Except for my birth.

Laureate

So Im the Assistant Editor for the Laureate, Western's undergraduate literary journal. Submit things!! You can submit up to 3 pages of poetry or 1500 words of fiction and it's due by November 1st. We also need cover art, so if you paint or do photography or anything like that, you can submit that too... you turn everything in to the front desk of Lee Honors College (you dont have to be in the Honors College to submit, though).

Freudian slip?

So I'm at work tonight, and Im at my table,and Im getting a drink order. If you've ever been a server, you know that you kind of have an order that you repeat things in, just because its easier to remember everything that way. So mine is "I have six local beers on tap, a full bar, wine list, ice tea, lemonade and pepsi products." So I start to say this to my table and I say "I have six local beers on tap, a full bar, wine list, ice tea, le-" and I get the "le", but I cant for the life of me remember "monade", all i can think is "le-sbian". But I know that thats not what I mean so I just stop and stand there and think really hard and start cracking up.
My table is like.. "umm.. okay."
In other positive news, someone in my apartment complex is blasting Tupac and Im loving it. How they are getting away with it in my riot-prone, heavily police-surveillanced neighborhood, I have not a clue, but Im loving it... Speaking of which, when I pulled onto my street there were four police cruisers hanging out, surveilling or something. I just get this awful feeling that somewhere in this city someone is getting mugged or a store is getting robbed, all while four cruisers are chilling in the parking lot of Jimmy Johns, making sure that no one is playing music too loudly..

Some Nice Thoughts...

"Earth is a dynamic planet!"- my geology book (hee hee)

"The highest compliment one can be paid by another human being is to be told "because of what you are, you are essential to my happiness"- Nathaniel Brandon

A Couple of Things...

I haven't posted in a long time, because I havent really had anything much to talk about. But now I do. I realized just now that I only post when Im pissed off about something. Therefore, at the end of the post, I will make a conscious effort to be positive. But for now, heres what pissed me off today...
So Im coming home from my photography class, and im all in a good mood, because the pictures I took this afternoon turned out really good. And then the top 5 countdown comes on. Most people, when they hear a song with stupid lyrics, they laugh. Not so much me. I feel genuine rage when I hear people on the radio with retarded lyrics, because I know that there are a million struggling people out there with good lyrics that write their own songs, who are waiting to get a record deal, probably playing in little clubs every night of the week, working as a waiter/waitress to pay the bills.. (digression..) In addition, I feel great rage knowing that Im going to have to sit through this song everytime I get in the car and turn on the radio.
Any how, here were the lyrics to the song I heard...
"Oh-my- starry-eyed surprise
sun down to sunrise
were going to dance all night to this DJ
dance all night to this DJ"
First of all, who the f@#k uses phrases like "starry eyed surprise"? wouldnt you just laugh at yourself if you said something like that?
Ignoring, for the sake of argument, that that is the dumbest phrase Ive ever heard, WHERE in the song is this 'starry eyed surprise'?
there is no follow up.
is the starry-eyed surprise the fact that they're going to dance from sundown to sunrise? Oh, big freakin surprise. Call the newspapers on that one...
I think the real starry-eyed surprise is that anyone gave those people a record deal.
Im getting all pissed off just thinking about it. And its one of the top 5 requested songs!! Granted, I was listening to the corny station, but nonetheless, who called in and requested that?
But now, for something happy.
I had a vegetarian sandwich from Schlotzskys Deli tonight. It was so good. I love vegetarian stuff. I have no money, so Im hoping that my boyfriend will buy me a lemonade at OP tonight. Hopefully he's reading this so he'll offer without me even asking.
In additional happy news, Im going to the apple orchard with my sister, brother-in-law, niece and my mom this weekend for a little hayride/apple picking thing. That will be great fun, my family is really cool.
Have a nice night everyone, despite my incessant bitching...

My Feelings on Rocks

Id like to take a minute to let you know what I think about rocks. I hate rocks. "What", you ask, "have rocks ever done to you?" Its not what rocks have done, but rather what the University has done. I have to take a science class with a lab for my gen ed 7 area, and so I spent two hours yesterday in a lab identifying different kinds of rocks. Just for the record, yes, I am being narrow minded about this. Im like the high school kid who says "why the hell do I need math?" and then goes bankrupt because he cant balance his checkbook. Math I can understand as being necessary. I suck at math, but I took it for my gen ed area without complaining, Id even say I kind of liked it. But rocks. If you can come up with a reason that I, in my anticipated life as a fiction writer and Creative Writing Professor will need to know that Flourite cleaves in four directions at 90 degree angles.. I will shut up. Email me with just one good reason, and I swear I will shut up, but Ive got to tell you , I just dont see one...

Rant or WHERE IS YOUR EMPATHY?

What is with all of the anti-September 11th memorial stuff lately?? There have been two articles in the Herald in the past two days about how the memorials are ridiculous and more or less self-indulgent, and how the US has killed as many people as were killed in the WTC, how can we say its so sad
. You know what, I bet that is true. But that isnt the POINT of the memorials. I am going to a memorial tonight, not because I think the government is so great and we've been oh-so-wronged. Im going because there are over 3,000 families in the US who have SUDDENLY and VIOLENTLY lost someone that they loved, and they had to sit there and watch the buildings collapse on TV that they knew their loved ones were trapped in. Now, that should make you stop and think about how unbelievably sad that is and how you should think about your own life.
It's not like youre going to be like "Oh, we killed your people, you killed ours, I guess we're even and we deserved it." Deserve it? Are YOU willing to lose YOUR life for a bad decision that your government made? Do you DESERVE it? Maybe America the government deserved it but the American people in that building did not. No. Matter of fact, if you've got that view, than you're part of the problem that is exacerbating this entire thing. We dont see it the same way as Muslim extremists, they dont see it the same way as us, so we kill each other. Whats the problem, they did it to us they deserve it, right? We did it to them, we deserve it right? Eye for an eye. Except that its REAL PEOPLE that are getting used as bargaining chips, that are paying for what we "deserve". Im pretty sure no one agreed to that. The people that jumped out of that building weren't the ones that said "well gosh, how about we kill poeple in other countries to get good gas prices" No. They went to work every day and did their job, and were thinking about how they had to pick up milk on the way home when a plane crashed into their building and they had to jump from the 110th floor because they had no hope of getting out.
And you know what, its true, we killed people in Afghanistan, and we are wrong, wrong, wrong for it, I totally agree with that. But I tell you what, I bet they are memorializing their people too. I hope they are, because that means that they are understanding the human aspect of the whole thing. Because anyone who is looking at the big picture of "We kill, we get killed back, we deserve it" is missing the same point as the terrorists and the american government are which is, THOSE ARE PEOPLE. There is no
"fairness" or "were even" or "eye for an eye" - its HUMAN LIFE.
Now I know that people are going to say things like Americans are spoiled, we bitch about, for instance low gas prices, and so our government does what it has to get the low gas prices to get re-elected. You know though, do you really think that people are aware of whats going on so that they can have gas 2 cents cheaper? Because I am with Anne Frank, I think that people are basically good at heart, and they dont know whats going on. So yes, as Americans we are rather uninformed. Thats not good. But does it warrant dying in a collapsing building? No. You know who IS responsible for that? The person that MADE the decision to kill people for low gas prices, and the complete lack of morals. I try to stay well informed, i read papers, take classes on current events, try to understand whats going on, but Ive got to tell you, I work 20 hours a week, take 15 credit hours semester, take photography classes, eat, sleep, have meaningful relationships with friends, and I have to do my laundry in there somewhere, and I may have, somewhere along the way, bought a can of tuna that wasnt dolphin-safe, but really, I dont think that I deserve to die for that.
NO ONE can be aware of EVERYTHING thats going on, NO ONE can be 100% sure that every company they buy from is upstanding and moral, that every American policy thats passed isnt harming other people, thats why we elect people to make it their JOB to know.
WHY cant we rely on the people we elect to make the best decisions?? There's the real problem.
What all of this comes down to is that those people were innocent and deserve memorials. In addition to that, dont you think that its good for people to take time out for a reality check and say, 'hey, wow, this kind of thing can happen, and I should think about my own life, and I should kiss my wife when I leave in the morning, cause I might never see her again." Go to a memorial and think about all of the people out there who are exactly like you, who loved things and wanted to go places and had families and think about the unbelievably tragedy that they lost that.
My favorite quote from one of those anti-memorial articles was "am I supposed to cry for these people that I didnt even know?" (sorry, thats not a direct quote, but you get the idea). Yeah. That kind of attitude is the same kind of attitude that the writer said he hated in Americans, the "I dont care as long as it isnt me". Not only that, but its unbelievably sad and inhuman. And thats exactly what terrorists were thinking when they slammed into those buildings, as Americans as a large chunk of people to hate, not as individuals with families and lives like their own
In conclusion, even if you think that the government was wrong and we had it coming, that isnt what the memorials are about, you should be able to empathize as a human with the tremendous loss of life and the unbelievable pain that the families of those people are dealing with. Maybe if everyone can think of each other as humans and give up the hatred and retribution bullshit this wont happen again..

Read this story, worth your time
Flight 93
And for Joe, here's a link you'll like

"So what is love then, is it dictated or chosen?
Does it sing like the hymns of a thousand years,
or is it just pop emotion?
And if it ever was there and it left, does that mean it was never true?
And to exist it must elude,
is that why I think these things of you?"
-Indigo Girls from "Mystery"

Upon Waking
by Denis Johnson

At the far edge of Earth, night
is going away. another
poem begins. slumped over

the typewriter I must get this
exactly, I want to make it
clear this morning that your

face, as it opens
from it's shadow, is more
perfect than yesterday; and

that the light, as it
hesitates over the approach
of your smile, has given this

aching bed more than warmth,
more than poems; someway

a generous rose, or a a very
delicate arrangement of sounds,
has come to peace in this new room

Lost Patience
I did something mean today. I was at Target, which is having its parking lot repaved, so there is only like two rows for parking, and they dont have any lines, so everyone kind of parked cockeyed... fine.. it was pretty much everyone parking next to each other except for this ONE lady who parked out in the MIDDLE of the driving lane, so cars could barely fit through and the trucks had to back up because they couldnt get through. HELLO? I got paper out of my car and wrote "You park like a fuckwit" and put it on her windshield. A little harsh? nah...

Some thoughts on fall semester...
I am now aware of what people are talking about when they say its different when you live in your college town year round. Last year Jenn stayed all year and she thought it was so wierd when people started coming back, and im like "why?" Yes, now I see. It is a drastic change to have everyone back here.. I dont know if its the large packs of girls in high heels walking down the street or the fact that everyone's couches are now on their front lawns... I feel like my town got invaded. I am now a college summer snob. Dont get me wrong, Im generally all about the college thing, I love that everyone in this town is up at all hours of the night. This is my problem. I live in an area very heavily populated with students. This is what it sounds like outside my apartment at night now. Cicadas, cicadas, cicadas, random "WHOO HOO! YEAH!", cicadas. Its not that the noise bugs me, not in the least. Its just that, come on people, you're fucking retarded. I go out with friends a lot. I have a really good time. At no point in time do I feel the need to scream at the top of my lungs "whoo hoo yeah." And the fact is, I can see you out of my sliding glass door. You're sitting on your lawn drinking beer. That is hardly something to "whoo hoo" about. So, If you get my point, the fact of the matter is Im annoyed by you only because you are making a complete ass of yourself and its hard for me to watch.