A few things-
1. I went to the mall today to finish up my Christmas shopping. Some of the malls here have metered parking. Does that sound like the worst idea in the world to you? Because a) people dont always have quarters so they wont come to shop at your mall when they otherwise would have come and spent $ b) people aren't going to take their time and look around if they're worried about the meter, they're going to go in, get what they came for and leave. Bad Idea, Mall People, Bad Idea! Trump would fire you!
2. Do you ever wonder about people who call into radio stations? Today, apparently, was this DJ's birthday, and I'm listening and this woman calls in. Here is the conversation-
Lady: HI! I just wanted to call and say happy birthday! I hope you have a fantastic day today!
DJ: Well thanks Polly, that's really nice of you.
Lady: So, are you getting out of town for the holidays at all?
DJ: Yeah, I'm going to visit my family in Austin tomorrow, actually.
Lady: Oh, I'm leaving too, on Wednesday, to go over to Pennsylvania to see my sister. Well, I want you to know that we'll miss you every minute that you're gone. Really, I hope you have a great holiday and New Year, and many blessings on you and your family
I'm not trying to be mean, I like being nice to people I dont know, I make an effort to let cars in ahead of me and whatnot, but doesnt this just seem a little crazy for someone you dont even know?
That's all I got.

I've got some really good news, though...

You know how they have those commercials that are really random and then all of the sudden they go "i've got some good news, I just saved a ton of money on car insurance"? Well, that's how I feel right now because I really did just save a lot of money on car insurance. Pretty sweet. I got a cheap quote and $100 off for joining rob's plan so now we have a multi-car discount.
Look what's happening to me, I'm talking about car insurance.
In other news, it really does not feel like Christmas to me at all, I don't know why. I've got a tree, I've bought all of my presents, I even watched The Santa Clause on ABC Family last week (wouldn't recommend it) but it really doesn't feel Christmasy this year.
Speaking of movies, you know what is good? This movie I got called Maria Full of Grace. It's about this girl from Columbia who decides to become a drug mule. It was so good. Get it. It was really interesting.
So, because school ended on Friday, the gym closed too, so I thought to myself, I'll be a scammer and get one of those two week trial passes to tide me over until it opens back up. Okay, Ballys? Madness. Dont go there. Think of the most A.D.D. crazy place you can come up with and you're there. Seriously. First of all, it was the loudest place I've ever been in my life. They were pumping dance music through the locker room speakers. I wanted to cover my ears and scream. And there are like approximately a million people in there. At once.
But, there was good news too.
I just saved a ton of money on my car insurance.
(come on, you saw that coming :) )

Why Rob and I are arch enemies-
Exhibit A- The Cheez-Its and Exhibit B- The ice cream

This is what Rob does. I'll buy something like, say, Cheez-Its or, I don't know, ice cream. And I'll get a little bit of it. But then Rob will eat 3/4 of whatever it is. But he knows that if I go looking for it and he's eaten like, the entire thing before I had a chace to have any, I'll get mad at him. So what does he do? He leaves like, the tiniest little bit. Today, I was looking for something for lunch. So I say, Cheez-Its, yum! I open the cheez-its. Do you know how many are left? Like, 10. 10 Cheez-Its in the entire box, and he put it back in the cupboard so, technically, he didn't eat it all. There is also a bag of chex mix that he ate all of then put the bag back in the cupboard with all the broken crumbs at the bottom. And the ice cream. I took the ice cream out of the freezer today- how much is left? MAYBE two spoonfuls.
I SHAKE MY FIST AT YOU, ROB MACINNIS!!

Dispatches from the library

1:39 p.m.- Someone on the other side of the room is doing that thing where you try to suck the snot out of your nose in much the same was as you gather spit to hock a giant loogie. Over and over again. It's so loud and I'm going to throw up.

1:59 p.m.- Have added page numbers to my paper. Am unhappy to see that the pages go to '11' and not '15', as had hoped. Also, am clearly updating to avoid further work which is nonetheless imminent. Also, have used the word 'imminent' in a sentence.

3:34 p.m.- Read an article on MSN Money that says you shouldn't tip the postman this holiday season.

The 2004 Survey

Oh yes, it's that time once again.
Copy it to your site and fill it out too!

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Voted, got married, moved to NY, started grad school, flew on Aer Lingus, and did and jig on a table for 13 Irish diners (true story!)

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I didn't have any last year- this year, pay off the damn credit card (right, cause that will happen)

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
um..no.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
again, no. knock on wood.

5. What countries did you visit?
Ireland

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
A little more $. A published story. Oranges. A fondue set- I asked for one for Christmas.. and then? WE WILL DIP EVERYTHING IN CHOCOLATE! HA HA! And some Oregon Chai, every time I go to the grocery store they're out of the regular kind. And some pumpkin bread. My mom said she'd send me some and I haven't seen a crumb of it. What's up with that, mom?:) Do I sound hungry to you? I am hungry.

7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
I don't know. Remember that time Jen and I got up at karaoke night and sang "I Will Survive?" That was a good one. Was that even in 2004? I don't know. It's too hard to remember this stuff a whole year after it happened.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I got into four of the seven schools I applied to. And I have lived in two very small places with another person without either of us causing the other bodily harm.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Despite my five month plan, I have failed to pay off my credit card bill.
But hey, if youre going to fail, fail miserably, and that I did. (Does this sound familiar? That's because I said the same thing last year)

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
There was that one time I was washing dishes and I cut my fingers open on a huge knife and ran downstairs with Rob's boxers wrapped around them to stop the bleeding and had to go to the hospital. I got two stitches.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
An MP3 player, I use it ALLLL the time! And Netflix! I freaking love Netflix. And my subscription to Oprah magazine. If you have a problem with Oprah I dont want to hear about it.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Sierra's when she won I Spy by claiming that what she spied was an invisible swinging monkey that no one else could see.
Axel's when we were camping and he said "Who do you think liked s'mores better, Lewis or Clark?

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
The people of Michigan when they voted to pass the ban on gay marriage

14. Where did most of your money go?
In the beginning of the year- On going out, having fun, food.
Now- On one very expensive room in a building where the elevator breaks every friday.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The wedding, going to Ireland, getting the wedding video back from Joe, the new Peanut Butter flavored Cinnamon Toast Crunch. For a while I was really excited because I had this great plan- I was going to send Danny a singing telegram for his birthday and embarrass the hell out of him. But it turns out singing telegrams cost $125. That put a dent in my excitement.

16. What song will always remind you of 2003?
The theme song to Sex in the City, considering I spent a solid two weeks watching every episode from all six seasons.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder?a toss up
ii. thinner or fatter? the same
iii. richer or poorer? oh, quite a bit poorer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
reading, hanging out with people, playing Balderdash

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
worrying about nothing, bitching about my job at Comstock when it was actually a really good job for the time being, watching American Idol

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
In Michigan :)

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
My sister, easily.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Desperate Housewives, Law and Order, The Apprentice. Jeopardy, while Ken was on there.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
no, I dont think so

26. What was the best book you read?
White Teeth by Zadie Smith. Awesome book. And, I read two Dan Brown books The DaVinci Code and Angels and Demons and enjoyed them both quite a bit.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I dont think I discovered anyone new. Sorry. You know who I like? JoJo. Don't tell anyone, it's embarrassing.

28. What did you want and get?
A hammock! I spent lots of time swinging in my hammock.

29. What did you want and not get?
A trust fund.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Garden State!!! Anchorman was a close second.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 23 and I drove to Chicago and met Lily and we took a picture together next to a giant baby head. Then I came back and Me, Rob, Jon, Jo, Joe, Ryan and Jen went to Shakespeares. I swear I only had two drinks, but by the end of the night I was.. well, drunk. I begged Rob to go to Meijers so we could get ice cream, and even thought it was on the complete other side of town, it was my birthday so he gave in. But when we got there I couldn't remember for the life of me what we were doing there, so I turned to Rob and said "why are we here?" and then he got pretty mad at me.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
More soup in bread bowls from Panera.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
I would describe it as a mix between "Hey, this is clean, I'll wear it" and "hey, this isn't clean, I'll wear it anyways." I would call it the year of the sweatshirt.

34. What kept you sane?
Pop. Mmmm.. Coke in a can.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I have a crush on Jon Stewart. And Elliot on Law and Order.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Oh God, let's just forget it. Seriously, let's pretend it never happened.

37. Who did you miss?
My sister, even though Rob would say "how can you miss her, you're on the phone with her for an hour every day", Danny and his badnickness, my parents, tanya and our champagne dates, Erin C., everyone in Kzoo (desperately), everyone at Food Dance (except Paul H., who I couldn't stand) even though I wanted out of there desperately in the end, and Sar even though I see her every few weeks because we used to live together and that was fun.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
You know, I don't really have a good one. There's a lot of other grad school students I really like, but no one I've gotten to know really well.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003:
Park your car in a well-lit place so it doesn't get broken into. One Long Island Ice Tea is enough, no need for a second.

40. Quote a song/movie lyric that sums up your year:
"Umm..I just ate a big red candle"

P.S.- Don't be skeezy

People bug me sometimes.
Today at the mall I watched this woman take all of her fast food trash out of her big old SUV- cups and bags and wrappers- and set it all on top of the base of a light pole in the parking lot. It's really cool that you think that someone else should take care of your trash instead of just taking it home and throwing it away yourself.
I get good movies from Netflix tomorrow! Dodgeball, The Terminal and the third Harry Potter!
And the fifteen page paper I'm supposed to be writing? Congratulations to me, I finished reading all the books and decided on a topic. I even went to the library and printed off criticism to cite for the paper. Now.. about actually starting to write it...

Freaky Deaky

Okay, seriously people, what the heck is this?
I saw it in the grocery store today and it seriously freaked me out. Apparently this is some new TV show? What is with all these new shows, it's like they're getting freakier and freakier. You know what that toy reminds me of? the movie Hellraiser, the guy who has nails coming out of his head. Here's what drives me crazy- I went to Toys R Us looking for walkie talkies for Sierra for Christmas. Oh no, they don't have walkie talkies anymore, unless you want the $40, high tech adult kind. Walkie Talkies have been replaced by a big, blue, fur-halfway-up-it's-head toy?

I'm really reaching this time...

I haven't posted this week because not a damn thing has been going on.
Anyhow..Whenever I go to Blockbuster or other places, I always want to buy those previewed movies. But really, of all that I've bought there are only two that I ever watch- Good Will Hunting and Love Actually. Over and over again. We just watched Love Actually again.
Today, I was in the locker room and, I always seem to get done working out just as the senior citizens swimming class is getting over with. These two ladies were sitting there talking about their nannies/housecleaners today. Because everyone here has either a housecleaner or a nanny. These ladies were crazy. One of them was going to fire her housecleaner because she was convinced that she had stolen her pants. Yeah, lady. Your housecleaner has got her eye on your pants. Get real. She's like "I can't ask her about it because she doesn't speak English."

And for your random knowledge, here are the first lines of the first fifteen songs currently on my MP3 player.
1. Now usually I don't do this, but uh, go on break um off with a little preview of the remix.
2. When I step into the light, my arms are open wi-ide.
3. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go shorty, it's your birthday.
4. Hey ma. What's up? Let's slide. Alright. Alright.
5. Poison. Yeah spot a man of freedom for a fact aah-aah uh-hum. Poison you ready Ron? I'm ready.
6. Just in, where to begin? Grin and bear it, it's bear and grim.
7. It's a new day, but it all feels old, it's a good life, that's what I'm told.
8. How do you want it? How does it feel? Comin up as a * in the cash game, livin in the fast lane, i'm for real.
9. Change? Shit. I guess change is good for any of us.
10. I seem to recognize your face... haunting familiar, yeah. I can't seem to place it.
11. Oh, walkin, oh. Just the other day. And it was so hot outside, oh, you could fry an egg.
12. Andelay, Andelay, Mama, EI, EI.. UH OHHHHHH!
13. Well, I woke up in mid-afternoon, cause that's when it all hurts the most.
14. I've been. Waiting a long time. For this. Moment to come, I'm. Destined. For anything at aaaa-a-all.
15.One more time. (coincidentally, this is the last line, and almost every line in between too!)

Well, there's ten minutes you'll never get back, eh? :)
Hope you're having a more interesting day...

Here I am, back where I started

Well. It's been a week. I've been on a few airplane rides. I've been to a wedding. I got a super cool reversible SpongeBob Squarepants watch from Burger King. I then, within hours of getting it, left it in the hotel room and now Jen is holding it hostage. I've been home to Davison. I've been to State (twice). I've eaten a lot. And now I am back here in my apartment, eating Au Gratin potatoes for dinner.
I'm sure there were some good stories to tell about all of that, but it's the kind of thing where you have to write about them when they're fresh in your mind or you forget.
Which I did. Forget them, that is.
My mom made some really good pumpkin bread for Thanksgiving. I wish I had some. Right now. If she wanted to.. I dont know, maybe, send me some?, I'd be okay with that... :)
You can check out the wedding pictures on the picture page. I'm not in any of them, because I was taking them. To see them, click on the "all" button on the left hand side of the picture page.
Today we went looking for a Christmas tree. We drove 30 min north of Yonkers to this farm where we picked apples in September and pumpkins in October. I'm upset with them. Do you know how much the absolute cheapest Christmas tree was?? $75!! GET REAL. I'm not talking six foot gorgeous trees. I'm talking four foot trees with three branches. And that was the other thing. There would be the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree and there would be this seven foot nicely filled out tree- and they were both $75. I'm writing these people a letter, oh yes, I am. But, we went to National Wholesale Liquidators (read: shadymart)on the way home and bought this pathetic fake tree, I love it, it was $15. And I put every last one of our ornaments on it, despite the fact that it is much smaller than the tree we had last year. Pictures to follow, shortly.
The funny thing about being back at home is that nothing I have to do went away while I was gone. What the hell? WHATS UP WITH YOU HOMEWORK?? ARE YOU STALKING ME OR SOMETHING?? JUST SITTING HERE WAITING FOR ME TO GET HOME?? Seriously, get a life.
And lastly- Jen, Ryan, Jon, Jackie, Paul and Joe- I made the reservation for New Years Eve- Just so you know!

Ramble

I'm at work for another 32 minutes before I can leave and go pick up Rob and get on a plane and go on vacation for a week. All I hear all day long is keyboards, click clicking all over the place. When I'm older, the sound of it is likely to send me into an uncontrollable nervous rage. But for now, it's just kind of irritating. Do you know how many books I have out from the library right now? Fifteen. That's bad news, because, being me, I am bound to lose at least one of those.
Last night, I decided to paint my nails, because we're going to a wedding and all. But I only had one thing of nailpolish. But Rob said it looked nice. I did one hand and started having second thoughts. But oh no, Rob said it looked great. So I kept it. It's bright pink. I feel like I belong at the Copa Cabana, sipping some drink that ends in 'tini'- like 'kissatini' or 'bikini-tini'. I feel like I need to have big hair to wear this nailpolish. Nice job, Rob, you suck as a nailpolish consultant.
clickety-click-click-click-clackclack.
Last night, for dinner I made Cream of Wheat. But it just wasnt working. And I couldn't figure out why. So I gave up on it and made pasta instead. Later, when I was putting the pot away, I figured out the problem. I forgot to put water in the bottom of the double-boiler. Hmm.
22 minutes.

What's with six members of Bush's cabinet resigning?

Aloha

So today I saw a license plate from Hawaii, and I thought to myself, Hmm.. I dont think I've ever seen a Hawaii license plate before! And then I realized that that was most likely because Hawaii is an island. So I thought to myself, how in the world did this car get here? These are the two scenarios I came up with.
(1) It was brought over on one of those boats that brings cars over oceans.
(2) The person who drives it is from Hawaii, but lives in NY for school, so they bought a car here, but registered it for Hawaii, and therefore got the plates.
But... those were kind of boring explanations.
If you have any other possible scenarios for how this Hawaii car got here, especially scenarios involving the following things-
1. espionage
2. a high speed car chase
3. a one-legged dog
4. Hawaii actually being connected to the US, but the government not wanting us to know because it will decrease the exotic factor
I would very much like to hear them, please post on comments.

What's the deal, CNN?

It's a wierd news day.
These are the stories that I read when I went on CNN.com this afternoon
"Grapefruit-sized ice chunks fall through roof of house"- Apparently some ice chunks formed on an airplane and then fell off and into this girls room? And they've got a picture of the girl sitting on her bed and this massive hole in the cieling above her.
"Great-Grandmother set to deliver twins" This 59-year old woman is having twins. She had her tubes tied. Her response? "They came untied."
Scott Hamilton has brain tumor. Umm.. depressing.
"Police Use Stun Gun on 6 Year Old" So this kid was in the principals office and got mad and broke a picture frame and started threatening the principal with a chunk of glass. That strike anyone else as kind of funny, or am I just sick? To me, it's straight out of a Ben Stiller movie. Anyhow, the police used a stun gun on him.

Bridget Jones came out today. The reviews don't look so good- that's too bad, because I really loved the first movie. I'm at work and there's nothing to do. And I found this site

Hee Hee.

Rob's response when I told him about this cracked out eye doctor I went to see today-
"Riighht.. and this guy had his own practice? Like, in a building? Or did you have to go through the kitchen to get to his office?"

How To Make a Weiner Dog in Five Easy Steps

Today I got a package from my dad in the mail. Inside was a "Learn to Make Balloon Animals" kit. What he's trying to do is freak me out, because he knows how much I hate clowns, and he's being like 'look! you can train to be a clown with this!" But this time, the jokes on him, because I think making balloon animals (when you're not dressed up in gigantic shoes) is cool as hell. So far I've made an octopus and a weiner dog. As soon as I figure out where Rob hid the digital camera, I'll take pictures of my creations and post them here.
I'm a page and a half through writing my Gatsby paper and I'm contemplating suicide. I have no idea where this paper is going. It's the freaking easiest, most obvious question in the world
( 'discuss the idea of East and West in Gatsby') but for some reason I just cannot structure this paper to make and sort of sense.
That's all for now. There's a balloon penquin calling my name.

Things I've Done This Morning to Avoid Doing All the Work I Have to Do

1. Read the washing instructions of our towels to Rob- in spanish.
2. Hummed the Star Spangled Banner really loud
3. Offered to shave Rob's legs.
4. Did an interpretive dance to a song he was playing.
5. Helped him change the words of a love song he was playing so it became a dirty song.
more to come, i'm sure.

COME ON, PEOPLE!

So, I've decided that there is absolutely no 'community' in my writing program. The thing is, the people are really nice, I talk to them in class and when I see them around and once a month we have a reading where everyone comes and eats pizza and drinks wine and reads their work in progress. But that's it. No one gets together on the weekends or anything like that. Now, I know that some of it is because a lot of the people in the program are older. In my workshop of nine people, three of them are over 30. Me and this guy Joe are the youngest in the entire program. But, what the hell does everyone who isn't old with a family do all the time? I thought for a while that maybe people do get together, and I just didn't know it, but I've been talking to the other people and they're like "no, I never hang out with anyone". So this kid Joel decided to organize a get-together for everyone at this little bar downtown Bronxville. 10 people show up. COME ON PEOPLE!! TV ISNT THAT INTERESTING. And this is coming from someone who is often very anti-social.

Ray, the Super, is irritating me. Our oven has been broken since Monday. Rob called about it on monday and left a message. Rob called about it on tuesday and left a message. We saw Ray wednesday on our way out for dinner (because we couldn't cook with a broken oven) and Rob asked him again, and he said "are you going to be home tomorrow morning?" I said I was, and he said he would be by to check it out. I waited until 11:30, and finally decided I had things to do. On the way to work this morning the elevator came up and he got out and saw me and suddenly remembered and said "oh, are you home, can I check that out now?" and I'm like "no, I have to be at work by 9 am (it was 8:50). But I asked him if he had keys to our apartment and he said he did so I told him it was fine if he just went in there and looked at it. Did he? No.
I'm trying to be patient, and I'm afraid to ask again because Ray will tell me to go to hell in a heartbeat.
I met with a professor about taking intermediate photography as my elective next semester. She described some of the assignments to me, and I really like the way she teaches the class, and I think I'm going to take it. PLUS- it means developing pictures for free. I'm going to take some black and white pictures for Jackie and Paul at their wedding, and this way I'll be able to develop them myself. But, I'm torn, because there's also a class second semester about the sixties. I'm in love with the sixties, I think they're so interesting. What to do? Feel free to vote via the comments.
I have to finish reading Gatsby so I can write a paper on it. I have to tell you, everyone seems to love this book, and I'm not seeing what all the hoopla is about.

HA.

This is from Rob's site, and is damn funny.

"But the biggest reason why Kerry didn't win was voters. What the hell. 120, 000,000 aint bad. But we can do better. I think that next time we should sign a petition that bans P-Ditty and Christina Aguilara from do anything other than write bad music. Vote or Die? A lot of people must have died."

Recuerdo

So, I don't like poetry. Okay, I don't like a lot of poetry anyhow. I find that it takes so damn long to try and decipher what their trying to say that it takes all of the fun out of it. And sometimes it tends to be, well, melodramatic. Yes, there are exceptions. But if you said to me, here, here's a book of poetry, I would say 'no thanks'. But we read this one in class last week and I really liked it.

Recuerdo
by Edna St. Vincent Millay

We were very tired, we were very merry-
We had gone back and forth all night on the ferry.
It was bare and bright, and smelled like a stable-
But we looked into a fire, we leaned across a table,
We lay on a hill-top underneath the moon;
And the whistles kept blowing, and the dawn came soon.

We were very tired, we were very merry-
We had gone back and forth all night on the ferry;
And you ate an apple, and I ate a pear,
From a dozen of each we had bought somewhere;
And the sky went wan, and the wind came cold,
And teh sun rose dripping, a bucketful of gold.

We were very tired, we were very merry,
We had gone back and forth all night on the ferry.
We hailed, "Good morrow, mother!" to a shawl-covered head,
And bought a morning paper, which neither of us read;
And she wept, "God bless you!" for the apples and the pears,
And we gave her all our money but our subway fares.

The 2004 Survey

Oh yes, it's that time, once again...
Copy it and fill it out on your site too!

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Voted, got married, moved to NY, started grad school, flew on Aer Lingus, got up on a table at work and did an Irish jig for 13 Irish customers (true story!).

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I never had any. Next years- pay off the damn credit card. Right, cause that'll happen...

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
umm... no.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
again, no.

5. What countries did you visit?
Ireland

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
A little more $. A published story. A fondue set- I asked my parents for one for Christmas. And then?? WE WILL DIP EVERYTHING IN CHOCOLATE, HA HA! And.. I'd like some Oregon Chai. Every time I go to the stupid grocery store their sold out of the original kind. And some pumpkin bread. My mom said she would send me some and I haven't seen a crumb of it yet. What's up with that, mom? :) Do I sound hungry to you? I feel hungry right now.

7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Remember when Jen and I got up at karaoke night and sang "I Will Survive"? That was a good one. Was that even in 2004? I dont know. A few of the Tuesday Girls Nights with Erin and Sara. This stuff is so hard to remember a whole freaking year later.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I got into four of the seven grad schools I applied to.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Despite my five month plan, I have failed, once again, to pay off my credit card.
But hey, if youre going to fail, fail miserably, and that I did. (Does this sound familiar? Hey, that's because it was the same thing I put last year..)

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Well, there was that one night that I cut my finger open while I was washing a big knife and I ran downstairs to Dave's with Rob's boxers wrapped around my finger to stop the bleeding and ended up going to the emergency room. I got two stitches.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
An MP3 player. I use it alllll the time. A disk drive for my computer (boring, but so true! until it broke recently)AND- NETFLIX!! Netflix is freaking great. And my subscription to Oprah magazine. If you have a problem with Oprah, I dont want to hear about it.


12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Sierra's when she won I Spy by claiming that what she saw was an invisible swinging monkey that no one else could see.
Also, Axel's when we went camping and he said "Who do you think liked s'mores more, Lewis or Clark?"

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
The people of Michigan when they voted to pass the ban on gay marriage.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Earlier in the year- to going out, eating out, having fun.
Later in the year- to one very expensive room in a big building with an elevator that's broken on Fridays.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The wedding, going to Ireland, getting the wedding video from Joe, going home for Thanksgiving.

16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
The theme song to Sex and the City, because I spent two solid weeks watching every episode from all 6 seasons.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder?toss up
ii. thinner or fatter? basically the same
iii. richer or poorer? Oh that's a funny question. I am quite a bit poorer this year, thanks.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
reading, hanging out with people, playing Balderdash, eating oranges

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
worrying about nonsense, bitching about my job at Comstock when it was actually a really good job for the timebeing.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
At home in Davison, which will be nice.

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
My sister, easily.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
Desperate Housewives! And, I have an addiction to the Apprentice, as you all know. Yes, I am ashamed. Close seconds- Daily Show, Jeopardy. I'm beginning to love Law and Order, my sister's fault.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I dont really think so.

24. What was the best book you read?
White Teeth by Zadie Smith. Awesome book. And I'm not ashamed to say I read two Dan Brown books- the DaVinci Code and Angels and Demons and enjoyed them both.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I don't think I discovered anyone new. Sorry. Want to know who I like? JoJo. Dont tell anyone, it's embarrassing.

26. What did you want and get?
A hammock. I spent plenty of time swinging in my hammock. And a shirt from my dad that says "Talk nerdy to me, I love the geek speak."

27. What did you want and not get?
A pony. Ha! just kidding! I dont know really.

27.5 What did you not want but got?
Fleas. Ha! just joking. I added that question just so I could say that.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Garden State!! Anchorman was a close second.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was 23, and I drove to Chicago to see Lily and we took a picture together next to a giant baby head statue. Then I came back to Kzoo. I went out to Shakespeares with Rob and Jon and Jo and Ryan and Jen and Joe. I swear I only had two drinks. But by the time we left I was...well, drunk. I insisted on Rob taking me to Meijers to get ice cream,even though it was on the complete other side of town, and since it was my birthday he gave in. When we got there, we walked inside and I totally couldn't remember why we were there so I turned to Rob and said "what are we doing here?" and then he got pretty mad at me.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
More soup in bread bowls from Panera. A trust fund.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2003?
I would call it a mix between "hey, this is clean, I'll wear it" and "hey, this isn't clean, I'll wear it anyways". I would call it the year of the sweatshirt.

32. What kept you sane?
Pop. I love pop. Mmmm.. Coke in a can.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I may have a crush on Jon Stewart. And Elliot from Law and Order.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Please, let's just forget it. I can't think about it anymore.

35. Who did you miss?
My sister, though Rob will say "how can you miss her, you're on the phone with her for an hour every day!", Danny and his badnickness, my mom and dad, Tanya and our champagne dates, Erin C, absolutely everyone in Kzoo (desperately), Food Dance and everyone who works there (except Paul H. who I couldnt stand) even though I was desperate to get out at the time, Sar because even though I see her every few weeks or so we used to live together and that was fun.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
I have been sitting here for a long time trying to think of someone new I met and really got to know well, and I can't come up with anyone. There are a few other grad students at Sarah Lawrence I really like, but no one I've gotten really close to.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2003:
Park in well lit places so no one breaks into your car. One Long Island Ice Tea is plenty, no need for a second.

38. Quote a song/movie lyric that sums up your year:
"Uh, I just ate a big red candle"

Good Morning, America
You're certainly a scary place to live today.

So all morning as I was watching the news, I was trying to post but blogger wouldn't work, and I think that maybe that was a message from God, because I was pretty pissed this morning, and probably shouldn't have been allowed to vote.
For your reading convenience I have divided this post into two parts 1. election stuff 2. other stuff. This way, if you want to skip right past all of my angry stuff, you have that option.

1. Election stuff
a. Well, I have to say, congratulations to Bush on actually getting ELECTED this year and not APPOINTED. That's the first step to being a real-live legitimate president. Don't get me wrong, you're not there yet, but you've made a step.
b. God save us.
c. seriously, i really was trying to do a good job about not being bitter, but... well, I'm not.
d. Michigan. You let me down. What is up with you? I love you so much and then you went and passed the law banning gay marriage. Here is a question I have for you, if you were one who voted to pass it. Do you reallly think that you have the right to tell people that you dont know if they're allowed to get married? No, Realllllly? If you do, I would like to hear your argument, so please post a response on my site. Here's the challenge though. You're not allowed to use religion as a reason. Because, as you'll recall, not everyone in this country has the same beliefs, so I can't imagine why you would try to govern the entire country by one set of them. I suspect that when you take religion out of the picture, the only thing people will say for a reason against gay marriage is something that comes down to the fact that people feel uncomfortable about it. And really, do you think that's a good reason to pass a law? I just dont. Some day I'm going to get elected and, since I think pork is gross, I'm going to pass a law that no one can eat pork. No seriously, I am, just because I feel uncomfortable about pork. What do you mean do I have a right to tell you what I eat? OF COURSE I DO, I GOT ELECTED.
e. more election anger later, I have a conference in 4 minutes.

2. Other stuff.
a. So my Party Assistant job this weekend- I'm working a party for PETA. Oh, PETA, you're thinking, the animal rights group. NO. Here at good old SLC, PETA stands for "People Eating Tasty Animals". No, seriously. They're having a pig roast. Gross.
To comment on this matter, I'm going to have my sister as a guest opinion on my blog, because she doesnt like meat, and believe me, she will tell you about it.

Hello.
please vote.
thank you.

Geo-rgia. Geoooorgiiaaaaa...

We saw the movie about Ray Charles today. Really, really good. That Georgia song... tear... makes me want to cry. I kind of didn't want to know that Ray Charles was a heroin addict though, I kind of just wanted to think he was a saint.
Let me tell you about my job last night. So I was a Graduate Party Assistant again- this time for two bands that were playing at the coffehaus. The opening band had a "special guest" named Red Lightning. Red Lightning is a 75 year old man with no teeth. He was wearing long black pants studded with fake jewels and a large kimono-like black shirt, also studded with star-patterned fake jewels and accessorized with a large jewel studded belt. To top it off, he was wearing some seriously cool sunglasses. Before the show, he walked around outside where I was, with a little tape player, playing "Run Around Sue" and singing along. He also performed with this radio, putting it up to the mic and singing along. Every once in a while, he tried to strike up a conversation with me. Examples-
"So... I just bought all those Twilight Zone episodes on.. what do you call that new thing? DVD? I figure, they're gonna be sold out soon and I want to get while the gettin's good"
"Hey, sweetheart, are you havin' fun? Good, good, now I'm happy"
"Hey! I just got a good idea. For my valentines this year, I'm goin to send out cards to all my girlfriends that say 'Wild Thing, You Move Me' "
Hmm...
Anyone dressing up and going to a Halloween party? What are you dressing up as?

Hello!

First, Erin, here is another damn funny open letter

Tonight I am doing another Grad Party Assistant job- at the 'coffehaus' which has been described to me as 'disgusting'.
Here is another one of the nonfiction essays I had to write for class- Except it's not actually about me, I stole a story Rob told me cause I couldn't come up with a childhood memory that week- so where you see "Laura" in the story, insert "Rob".

My Very First Published Work

So the other day, a few weeks ago, someone broke into my car while it was parked on a backstreet behind my apartment. It was no big deal, since there was nothing in there to steal, they just made a huge mess. BUT- I wrote one of those "Open Letters To Entities that are Unlikely to Respond" (on McSweeney's website) to whoever broke in and sent it to McSweeneys. They just emailed me back that they're going to publish it on the site! Yay! Exciting! I don't know when, but when they do I'll link to it.

Slice of life with Dolores

I'd like to let you in on a part of my daily life. A woman named Dolores lives down the hall from me, I would say she was about 75, and we always seem to be leaving at the same time, so we take the elevator down together. And we have the same conversation. Every day. Don't get me wrong, I like Dolores just fine. But is it possible to have the EXACT same conversation every day? To all you disbelievers, I answer 'yes'. Please see transcript from daily elevator ride with Dolores below.
Dolores: Oh hello!
Me: Hi Dolores, how are you?
Dolores: Oh, fine, fine. It's chilly today!
Me: Yeah, it's getting pretty cold.
[Laura and Dolores enter elevator]
Dolores: So, tell me, how do you like it here?
(at this point, Dolores looks deeply concerned, and even if I hated it, even if I was contemplating suicide, I would still have to tell Dolores I liked it, because she seems very concerned)
Me: Oh, we like it a lot.
Dolores: Yeah, it's quiet, you never hear nothin.
Me: Yeah, that's nice though.
Dolores: 44 years I live here, I never hear nothin. People keep to themselves. Never had no problem with anyone here.
Me: Yeah, everyone's really nice.
Dolores: And your husband? Rod? How does he like his job?
(I've corrected Dolores a few times, but now, I've just decided to let him be Rod)
Me: Oh, his job's going really well.
Dolores: Oh good, good. He's so nice.
[Elevator reaches lobby]
Me: Okay, well have a good day
Dolores: Yeah, you too, sweetheart.
Do you think Dolores doesn't remember that we've had this conversation? Or do you think she's going "Geez, that Laura, never nothing new to say"?

I reserve all my cheating for Monopoly, thank you....

Joe, I maintain that I did not cheat that time. My cunning Clue skills are world renowned.
So, tomorrow and tuesday are "October Study Days" at SLC (Read: made up reason to take two days off). At the school offices they get one day off, half the staff works Monday and half work Tuesday. But obviously, everyone wants Monday off so they can have a three day weekend, so my boss asked me to work on Monday so everyone in the office could get it off. This is going to be sweet. Here's what I do: (1) Get paid $10/hour. (2) answer the phone and since I dont know the answer to any of the questions, say "The person that can help you with that will be in tomorrow, I'll leave them your name and have them call you back". (3) Work on homework/writing/reading all day, which is what I was going to be doing anyways, only for free.
In other news, I have freaking horrible posture, but everytime I notice and try to correct it I realize how uncomfortable it is to sit up so straight and just go back to slouching.
Kalamazoo people-here is my idea- Rob and I are going to be there for New Years Eve, and we were thinking it might be fun to go to the Food Dance New Years Eve party thing- it's fifty bucks a person and you have a five course meal with it. It starts at like 7ish and is over by 10ish and then we could go out and do other stuff. It is a little expensive, but I thought it might be fun to dress up and go out together- anybody interested in that? I know, it's two months away but you have to get tickets a little bit early. If people aren't really all that excited about that idea, that's cool, but let me know what you think....
Does anyone else watch Desperate Housewives? It's really really good. I might even say better than the Apprentice.
Well, that's all I've got right now. I spent all day playing Monopoly with Rob, so really I'm having trouble coming up with a lot of interesting discussion...

Monopoly

So Rob and I played Monopoly last night. And I kicked his ass. And I cheated, so so bad. I was all landing on his property and he didn't notice, and I was mortgaging property and then not paying it back and still charging rent and developing it. It was so great. Until Rob got mad because he was losing so bad and I was forced to tell him how I cheated. But anyhow. I haven't played Monopoly since I was really young and we used to play it with the Edwards down the street. So, turns out when we played it then, we didn't play by the rules at all. Who knew? I thought that when you landed on free parking you got all the money from Community Chest that was in the middle, and I had never ever mortgaged anything until last night. And all this other stuff. Did we just make up our own rules or something? Probably. So that's all. We're having a rematch now and Rob's going to watch closely this time, so its not going to be any fun.

Shoop, Shoop, Shoop, Shoop.. SAAAAYYYY! Shoop, Shoo-be-doooooo

Guess what I'm watching? Oh yeah, Waiting to Exhale on Bravo. Rob is lovin it.

You know how when a game is really close, some fans can't watch it because it makes them too nervous? That's how I feel about the election. Here is a sight that's kind of cool, it shows whos winning by electoral votes. But yesterday, it had Kerry winning Florida and Bush winning Ohio, and now apparently new polls say it's the other way around. I don't think I believe that polls are all that accurate when it's this close.

The Apprentice, Writing, and Why American Lit Class Irritates Me

First of all, I love The Apprentice.
I know its bad. But its so so good. How did I get sucked into this? I have absolutely no interest in business. Stacy got kicked off tonight, finally, I couldnt stand her- I really can't imagine who would hire her to be their lawyer.
Moving on, I'm working on a new story and I'm really excited about it. I wrote the first draft in the past two weeks and it wasn't really clicking together.. and so I obsessed about it for a while, and avoided it and complained about it and drank about 20 diet cokes... and then I got this great idea and wrote fifteen pages in the last 24 hours. It involves Michigan and fruitstands and adultery, all the elements of a good story. And, of course, I kill someone off in it.
Also on my list of new obsessions- The Daily Show. Could John Stewart be the funniest man alive? I'm thinking yes.
On to other things- American Lit Class annoys me sometimes.. which is sad because I really like reading the books and talking about them, but without fail someone will read waaaaayyy too much into it. Okay yes, sometimes there are symbols and things in there, but sometimes people are just looking way too hard. People, it is neither a treasure hunt nor a conspiracy plot. If the writer wanted you to see something, they'll drop enough hints so you get if you're reading closely. BUT SOMETIMES, ITS JUST NOT THERE. Please, please stop because you annoy the hell out of me.
I carved my pumpkin last week, but it's too warm in my apartment so it molded over. Sad day.
We had split pea soup for dinner tonight. Wouldn't recommend it.
My niece is being a "Barbie Dinosaur" for Halloween. If you think you have ever seen a Barbie Dinosaur that may be cuter, you are sadly mistaken my friends. In regards to that, my sister and I can't figure out exactly what is so 'Barbie' about this dinosaur, and furthermore, since when was Barbie claiming she was around when Dinosaurs were alive? But you know, we're going with it.
Also, I talked to my little brother tonight. Hi Danny! And I talked to my parents. No, I haven't been on the phone all night, clearly I got off in time to watch The Apprentice.
And lastly, take Ryan's advice and go to the picture page and press 'back' and 'next' really fast and watch me do the robot!!

My Weekend

A few things-
First, my new job- well, I was 'security' at the Coming Out Dance. First, the highlights-
Best Girl Costume/Outfit- bright red hot pants, absolutely no top, Kerry/Edwards bumper sticker across her boobs.
Best Boy Costume/Outfit-A very short (less than five foot), very built African American gentleman with long dreads wearing bright red sequined biker shorts.
Most disturbing Girl outfit- Girl with no shirt and 'slave' painted on her chest being led around by her neckwith a leash by a guy with 'master' painted on his chest.
Most disturbing Boy outfit- patent leather butt cheek-showing shorts, no shirt, leather whip
I have now seen far too many people in thongs, garters, and corsets. The gross thing was, I was supposed to walk around the room and make sure there was nothing scandalous going on , so you know how when it's really crowded you kind of have to push past people. Yeah, it was that, only everyone was naked and sweaty. Nast.

Second- Me, Rob and Sara went and got pumpkins this weekend. I didnt do such a great job carving mine though. We're not going to have any trick-or-treaters here and that makes me sad.

Third- this is really cool, Sara showed it to me when she was here- you go to this site and it's for teachers who work in low-income schools and they write proposals for materials they need for their class or trips they want to take their class on. You can pick the one you like and pay for it, or if you're broke, you can just partially fund it and donate like $20 or something like that.

Fourth- Have you heard this "my goodies" song? The lyrics are "I know you want my goodies, I know you've thought about it. " 'Goodies' makes me think of baked goods.

Fifth- According to CNN, they think that Kerry is going to get Ohio. Good choice, Ohio.

Sixth- My sister hasn't bothered to call me all day. Clearly she no longer cares about me.

That's all. Happy new week.

So, I got a new...job?

Right, so I am now a Graduate Party Assistant, which means I go around campus and watch over the registered events- its just like, every other weekend or so. Anyhow. So I'm working at the Coming Out Dance this weekend... apparently this is a very big deal here... when the guy hired me he's like, okay, so people are going to show up naked. What? where do I go to school now? And then, a mass email was sent out to the students that said "the rules for the dance are you can not be nude (hint: t&a is okay)". Again, what? I will have a good blog to post after friday night...

Give My Regards To Broadway

So I'm on the elyptical machine today. And this kid comes in and gets on another elyptical, and first of all, he gets on the one right next to me despite the fact that there are 5 others to the right of me that are open. That always really irritates me. Why do people do that? So they can be really close to other sweaty people? Anyhow, so I'm all doing my elyptical, and I start to notice that any time I speed up a little, the kid next to me speeds up, and then looks over at me. And I'm going, are you racing me, buddy? But I thought maybe It was a conicidence. So I speed up a little more, and guy next to me kicks it into high gear, and I SWEAR TO YOU, he's looking over at me. So I laugh, which I shouldn't have done, but it was damn funny. And the whole time, you know how you kind of pump your arms. like when you're running? He's doing that, but his fingers are spread out, like he's got Spirit Fingers. He looked like a broadway dancer, with his spirit fingers and rapid leg pumping movements. You know what it kind of reminded me of? In Zoolander, where they have the model walk-off thing. I think if I would have stayed just a little longer I could have gotten him really worked up and he may have broken into a stirring rendition of "New York, New York" or maybe something from Cats, he looked like a Cats kind of guy. That reminds me of a story. When I was little my best friend was Megan Bennett and she loved the musical Cats, she had probably seen it a million trillion times. So she named all of her cats after cats from the musical. But they all died. Jenny-Enny-Dots (sorry if that isn't right, I've never seen it, the thought of watching gigantic Cats dance together terrifies me) died when a chain link fence she was trying to dig under fell on her. But you never ever brought it up, because it was this like, really touchy no-no subject. Grisabella (?) was fine until she started to pee all over the basement and then she was.. disposed of. There were a few others, but those are the only ones I remember. So the moral of the story is... cats are evil. And so are broadway dancers. And broadway dancers exercising like freaks. And I feel like the biggest moral is, if you've got the money to see a Broadway show... don't pick Cats, okay? There are so many good shows out there (that I will never see, because I can't even afford to rent them...). I feel like we've all learned a lot here today.

Umm...

So a third post for today..
I'm reading this news story at cnn.com
Go there and read it, it's about a girl who attacked her babysitter with a machete.
Troubling enough on it's own, but here's what's really bothering me-
"The altercation continued until the girl found the machete lying in the yard and began to chase the woman, who took refuge in the bathroom, Hubbard said."
..... I'm sorry... she found the machete in the yard? Righhhhhttt... god, people need to be more careful about leaving those machetes out where people can get them.
?
Between the Bush rally at the elementary school and the machete, it's been kind of a disturbing day...

Scared.

Why are the ELEMENTARY school kids on the playground across from my apartment shouting "Four more years"? Is this a sign of the apocalypse? I'm scared.

So.. it's Thursday.

I was on my way out to do all these errands- take books back to the library, work out, mail some stuff.. buuuuuttt.. it turns out Rob accidentally took my keys with him to work. So.. I'm doing nothing. I did just make myself some Cream of Wheat though.. ymmm.. you know whats the worst? when you make Cream of Wheat and then you're adding the milk and sugar and you put too much milk in... and then its all watery and it just ruins the whole thing. And after all that hard work.
I just remembered something last night. When I was little I had all the boring regular Barbies, but for some reason my sister got this cool Hawaiian Barbie named Miko. Every time we played Barbies I wanted to be Miko, but she never let me because face it, if you've got cool Hawaiian Barbie are you really going to share? On the other hand, I did get Peaches and Cream Barbie (Hey sickos! this was before 'peaches and cream' referred to anything other than actual, literal peaches and cream, so I dont want to hear the jokes, got it?) with pink sequin-ny formal dress, and I did have that cool Barbie-sized comforter made out of neon pink material and lace... but I would have traded them both for Miko. And you know what else? I had She-Ra Castle and a bunch of She-Ra dolls.. but my sister had the Blue Ice She-Ra doll that I always wanted too. Did my parents like my sister better?
Furthermore, Erin, I wanted to tell you about my ghetto window treatments because I knew it would make you cringe- So I go to work on my computer today but my desk is in front of the windows and it's like 8:30, so it's really bright. So I took those curtains you gave me and taped them up (yes, taped). But it was still way too bright, so I took one of those Bubble Mailer envelopes and taped it to my window to block out the sun. Thought you'd like that.
That's all for today...

Why You Should Be Poor

So, we used to go out with Ryan and Jen and have drinks like twice a week, but since we've moved to New York we are way too poor to go out and drink. No, actually we are too poor to even buy alcohol. But today, we get this rebate check for $6.50 from Charter because we overpayed them a few months ago, and I'm all like sweet! let's get some of those Smirnoff Twisted things No folks, the patheticness of this situation does not escape me. But anyhow, we get some and I'm drinking one and I call my sister and after a while, I'm having trouble forming sentences and my tongue is starting to feel all big. And I look at my bottle and it's only half gone. Yes my friends, It's been so long since I drank that I got tipsy off of half of a wine cooler. This is why you should aspire to be poor. I could get tipsy for the next six nights and only spend $8. Ha.:)

Ray Hearts Halloween

So our Super is this skinny muscley guy (Ray) who is all tough and whatnot, and he's always saying stuff like "a'ight" and "whadda you think?" and he constantly wears this Co-Ed Naked Firefighting shirt ("come slide down my pole"), usually for several days in a row, and he's usually to be found in the elevator, smoking a cigarette directly underneath the No Smoking sign and if you see him and you say hi there's only about a 50% chance that he'll say hi back- the other times he will either act as if you're not not alive or do that head-chin nod-jerk thing. Once, Rob was trying to be nice and make conversation and he's like "So, do you have another place on the weekends?" (because he lives in the building but he leaves on the weekends) and he kind of looks at rob and then he's like "yeah. I got a wife. I got a kid and I got a place in the Poconos. I mean, whadda you think?" And were like.. uh.. we dont know... So anyways, we come home from work the other day and there are Halloween decorations all over the lobby, and we're cracking up, cause we're picturing Ray out there hanging them up and Rob starts impersonating him in the elevator , saying "Yeah, I fuckin' love Halloween, I mean, whaddah you think? I love those fuckin' ghosts, all white and shit', they kill me. You know whadd'I mean?" So I'm all laughing and whatnot. And then we come home today. And there are more decorations. The lobby is pretty much covered now. There's a big banner and ghosts taped up in the elevator. Ray must really get into Halloween. (I mean, whadda you think, you know?)

Why I Can't Use Ebay

So Ebay, good in theory and all, but... I can't use it. Because I take it really personally when I get outbid. Like, for instance, this Joss Stone CD I bid on. I saw her video on MTV on Sunday or something and I really liked it, so I got on Ebay and found a CD that was going for $5.00, so I bid $5.50. With shipping it would be like $7.00, not too bad. And I didn't hear anything since then, and now, 5 hours before I win, someone comes in and bids higher than me. RUDE!! I've been bidding on this all week and now, right before it's over, you just swoop in and steal it from me? THERES A NAME FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU. SO.. I say, two people can play this. So I try to outbid them. Oh yeah, I went all wild and bid $6.50. AND THEY OUTBID ME AGAIN. You know what I have to say to you, new owner of a Joss Stone CD? There is a special place for people like you. Oh yeah, I hope you enjoy your music, live it up, because THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES FOR YOUR ACTIONS. Seriously, people dont like people like you.

Edward P. Jones is reading at SLC tonight. He won the Pulitzer Prize last year. That's why I'm going, I feel like we have a lot in common-He won the Pulitzer Prize and I'm going to win it. I figure we have a lot to talk about. hee hee:) Seriously though, I'm reading his book right now and it's really good.
It's currently 8:21. I have class at 11:30. And yet, I'm trying to convince myself that I dont have enough time to workout.
Have everyone seen Mean Girls yet? I'm highly reccomending (sp?) it, it's completely hilarious.
As you can see I'm trying to kill time so that I actually wont have enough time to work out....

Why do people have to go and make my blood boil?

This is the letter I wrote to Budget. They're trying to screw me over.
Read it.

I was thinking that it would be funny if at the end I wrote
P.S. You're an assclown.
Rob didn't think that sounded very professional, so I left it out.

P.P.S. My sister is going to yell at me for saying assclown.
P.P.P.S. So is my dad. Sorry dad. I'm standing in the corner.

Writing Sample

So I'm taking this Craft of Nonfiction class (which I dont like, if you're curious) and each week we have to write a 300 word essay on something. This week we had to write about relatives.
Read my essay here.

ARE YOU REGISTERED TO VOTE?
If not, you have one week from Saturday to do it!!
Thank you and have a nice day.
(I'm Laura W., and I approve this message)

From the Does This Ever Happen To You? files

So three times yesterday, I'm all cruising along in my car, listening to the radio ("Connecticut's soft contemporary 99.9... soft, but still contemporary") And I'm all loving the song which is soft, but by no means contemporary, and then I pull up to a stop light. And I get all embarrassed, because it's one thing to listen to Can You Feel the Love Tonight by yourself, but quite another when someone is next to you and could potentially look over and say "what the hell are you listening to?" So then I have to roll up my windows, because Im too self conscious to enjoy my song at this point, but not enough that I'm willing to turn the station. So then we get going and i put the windows down (cause its hot) and then I pull up to another light five minutes later and up they go again. Sounds wussy, but if you are willing to listen to Im Forever Yours (Faithfully...) in traffic, you are a braver person than me. I will say however, that I kept them down for Straight Up Now Tell Me.

"So, the other day, I was thinking about how I should like history, but.. I still don't."-my sister

In recap...

So Michael Moore came and spoke at my school on Monday. It got way too intense, so it took me this long to come up with what I was going to write. On one hand, I think that he is a bit defensive. Because really, if you make movies about controversial subjects, you should be prepared to deal with lots of dissenting opinions. On the other hand, I feel like younger people who admire him think of him as this like, god or something. They think that he has all the answers. Like this kid that raises his hand and asks him "so how are we going to get out of Iraq?" and he's like "I don't know, I didn't think that we should have gone in the first place" and the kid is like "yeah, but now that we're there, how do we get out without it being taken over by warlords and stuff" and he's like "seriously, I don't know" and they got mad at him. Seriously people, he's not your elected official who's job is to come up with policies- he's a filmmaker who just so happens to expose government lie type stuff. I don't think that just because you say "our government is wrong" that you should have to say "and here's how I plan to fix it" Isn't it enough to show that something's wrong? Isn't that kind of like the first step to changing it? Anyways- so I have this thing where I get really really nervous for people. Like, if someone stands up and asks a dumb question, I get nervous for them like it was me that was doing it. There were several points where I almost had to leave because I was so nervous and embarrassed. One of the girls had been arrested for protesting at the RNC and she stood up and asked him if he would pay the legal costs for the 12 people who had been arrested from the school. Um... No. This is what I'm talking about- they're like "oh, Michael Moore, he hates the Republicans, he'll help us fight injustice by paying for our legal fees" Seriously people, he's not your liberal sugar daddy, it's not going to happen.

Things My Apartment Is Currently Hotter Than

*Cement that's so hot you could fry an egg on it
*Cancun, Me-hee-co
*My last apartment
*A hot tin roof that a cat is on
*Hell
*The room that Nelly is in that's so hot he wants to take all his clothes off
*The "Firehouse" sandwich composed of jalapenos, tabasco, and garlic that I, like an idiot, ordered
*James Brown's hottub

Hey, curious what I don't want to do? READ THIS BIG DUMB BOOK FOR TOMORROW!! I have to read this memoir buy this guy who, pardon me for saying so, didn't really have the most captivating of lives. It supposed to be read by tomorrow, with a 300 word essay to accompany it. I'm on page 5. It's 388 pages long. It's 11 p.m.
Hey, I was in Brooklyn tonight at McSweeneys. Want to know what driving on the major highways around here reminds me of? MarioCart. It's like, "wow, I'm going really fast. Hope I don't crash... certainly are a lot of turns... lots of fast cars..."
Yeah. Gotta go read.

My new Times Square friends.

Seriously, this place has multiple personalities. This morning, I'm on my way to school, I get out to my car at 9:05. There is no parking on my street from 9am to 11am on Tuesdays because it's street cleaner day. So of course, there's already a ticket on my car, because they were probably sitting there waiting at 8:59 so they could nail me cause they're JERKS. And this is no $15 dollar Kalamazoo ticket. $55 freaking dollars for parking on the street for 5 minutes too long! I was so mad. So I get in my car and go to school and I park and then I'm walking into the gym and the parking attendant pulls over to me and he's like "do you have a parking sticker on your car?" and I'm like "yeah". And he's like the nicest guy in the world. He's like "oh, how is the parking here? do you ever have any problems finding a spot? what about at night? is the lot lit well enough? well, if you ever have any problems, you come and tell us and we'll take care of it for you." Um... what? Do you remember the WMU parking nazis? what the heck is this guy doing being nice? OKAY, WHATS UP WITH YOU, YONKERS? ARE YOU MEAN AND SPITEFUL OR ARE YOU NICE AND HELPFUL? WHY DONT YOU MAKE UP YOUR FREAKING MIND?? SERIOUSLY YONKERS, DO YOU WANT TO FIGHT ME? GET YOUR DUKES UP.I started my new job today, and I was making file folders for all the new students. I did like 400 folders and I messed up on like 10 of them, so I just put them in the bottom of the box. So when I was getting ready to leave my boss is kind of looking at the folders. Is ten folders out of 400 a lot to waste? can you fire someone for accidently wasting folders? cause, i thought it would be better to start over than to cross off the mistake and write over it. That looks kind of unprofessional, right? Seriously, for the next two days I'll be convinced that I'm going to get fired for this.

Hippie State University

So, I go to a hippie school. Don't get me wrong, I love it, but at the same time it's completely hilarious. You know how you would always see all the people in Abercrombie at Western, especially the freshman? No. Skirts. Long flowy skirts. Lots of layered clothes and non-matching clothes. Head scarves galore. Lots of anti-Bush tee shirts.
But this isn't even the half of it. The undergrads have no majors. They're supposed to have a well-rounded education, so there are no majors, you're supposed to touch on a little of everything. Also, no grades. Nope. Just evaluations that the teachers write out for each student (which they can do because there is a max of 15 students to a class and 2 classes to a professor). And lastly, I was helping run registration for undergrads this week (when I say 'helping', i mean 'desperate for money and working') A bunch of them came in late and they're like "I didnt get to register because I got arrested" Yeah, like a huge group of them got arrested for protesting at the Republican National Convention.

Also, I'd like to take this opportunity to suggest that everyone get Netflix. It's awesome. $22 a month, you get as many movies as you want, up to three at a time. So I order them, it takes one day to get here, I watch them, I send them back (which takes one day), and they send me the next three that are in my 'queue'. It's awesome. And postage is paid both ways. Get it. Or else.

Did laundry today. Big fun.

Updates.
Here are some new pictures so my mom can see how the cool curtains she made me look in our apartment.
Also, go back to the "Flea Market Post" for a new picture.

Go Here. Laugh while you are there.

www.hamsterman.com

Ha.
Read Me

joseph.

you think I can just update on a whim? I'm an artist, damnit! I update when I have a stroke of brilliance only. Which is why I havent updated lately.. just kiddin, im just lazy, i'll get on it

In other news, you know how in classes there will always be at least one 'older' student who feels the need to raise their hand ALL the time and blah on for hours? My sister has decided that next time that happens she's going to knaw their arm off and be like "sorry buddy, but you've been using it a bit too much."

Yonkers Flea Market

Oh, what to say about the flea market? How about this- If I was robbed while living in Yonkers, I think the first place I would go is to the Yonkers Flea Market, and I think I would be able to reclaim my stolen goods there.

Rob and I both bought hats for $1 each.



(Yes I'm looking sassy, how could you not in such a fine hat?)

You can't see it, but Rob's hat actually says "Marlboro" across the front.
We saw a guy there selling DVD's for $10 each- the movies he was selling- The Village, Suspect Zero, Princess Diaries 2... movies still in the movie theatre. But I'm sure they're not internet download ripoffs, he must just have really good connections:)

So we just went and saw "Garden State". Is this playing at a lot of places? Cause I had never heard of it, I picked it at random. It was so good. And when I say so good, I mean so, so good. Go see it. Now.
In other news, we hung the curtain dividers in our apartment giving us several different "rooms" (ha! yeah right!) Updated "apartment's looking better" pictures to follow. Flea market tomorrow. We've driven by the place its at several times. If things are as they seem, we will actually come home with fleas. Looking forward to it. Do you know how much it is to rent a movie at Blockbuster here? $4.75!

Potpourri
Things are looking up. It is now friday, and I start orientation on monday. The thing is, we're bored. We're sitting in our apartment a lot. But this will all soon come to an end. Tomorrow we are thinking of going to MoMA. Sunday we are going to the Yonkers Flea Market (guaranteed to be full of all kinds of wierd, shady things and will make for an excellent blog later on). Sunday night Im going into Manhattan to hang out with Sara. Orientation on monday for me, with all kinds of grad mixer events going with it, and rob will go and fill out all his paperwork for his new job. And it's about freaking time. I'm ready to start. I've been at the library working on a story all week and it's really starting to come together. This makes me happy. This makes me excited to write. Some days you have to make yourself do it and some days its kind of exciting.
Rob is making spaghetti right now. All afternoon he's been practicing singing lyrics from a Ludacris song, because he's bound and determined to be, and I quote, "a Ludacris impersonator. You know, like Elvis, only Ludacris." I'm sure our neighbors can hear us through the walls and I think they're organizing board meetings about us.
Next week I'm going to a reading at McSweeneys. Partially I'm going because it will be cool. Mostly I'm going because I have a wierd crush on Dave Eggers. Don't tell him.
I got my old school Nintendo to work again. I've been playing Dr. Mario like a mad woman. Jen D., there will be a showdown around Thanksgiving. Speaking of Thanksgiving, what do you guys think about having another Friend Thanksgiving on a much smaller scale. We will be in town Nov 21-26. We'll be w/family for the actual day, but maybe the Sunday before or something?

New York driving- what the fk?

Let me describe to you the phenomenon that is New York driving. Okay, so everyone is in this huge freaking impatient rush. Michigan- You only honk if you’re pretty pissed off, and if you get honked at, you’re really offended. New York- You honk if a bug flies in front of your windshield. I was sitting at a light today, and a guy starts honking before the light even turns green. But the thing is, no one gives a crap if they get honked at. But, this is not my problem. My biggest problem- the New York “pull over and chat it up” complex. Michigan- you see someone you know on the street, you either honk and wave or you pull over and find a parking spot. New York- See someone you know? Oh! Well, just stop your car in the middle of the lane and start a conversation. Can’t find a parking space on the street? Just park it in the middle of the lane and go in. Here’s the think I don’t get- NOBODY HONKS!!! They just pull into the next lane (without fail, cutting someone off) and go around them. Hello?? Honk if you have no reason, remain patient and go around when there’s an actual law being broken?? I don’t get it.

Pictures of our Apartment!! (ignore the lack of wall decoration, we haven't gotten that far yet..)

Click here to check out my new picture page.

Truckers, You Know You're Not Right...

So, I'm driving today. And I'm stopped at a stop light, and there's this semi next to me and he keeps inching forward a few inches and then hitting his breaks, two or three times. So, I'm thinking, what, is he trying to tell me that I'm not pulled up far enough? So I look up at him. Oh no, he's doing nothing of the sort. He's moving forward and craning his head so he can look in my car and he has this disgusting "im a dirty, dirty man" smile on his face. LISTEN UP TRUCKERS. AT NO PLACE ON YOUR OPERATOR'S LICENSE DOES IT SAY 'PERMITTED TO BE TOTALLY DISGUSTING'. I realize that you don't see other people for long periods of time. This does not mean that you have the go ahead for the oggoling of people driving beside you. Seriously.

Here I am, at the friendly neighborhood Yonkers Public Library. I'm tired of putting things away in the apartment. Doing anything adventurous seems like a lot of work. Last night I was going to rent a movie but then I realized that I would lose my parking place (which are few and far between) and decided not to. And I am broke, my friends. Oh there are a million things to do around here. And they all require some sort of money. For another two weeks or so, money is not something I have. I found some outlet malls and was planning on going to them today, when I realized that window shopping at an outlet mall would be a bittersweet experience. I just want to start school and get things going, because this whole "entertaining yourself in a thrifty way" thing is not working out for me. We could go into the city, but we did that yesterday, and by the time you drive into Manhattan, find a parking place, find a subway station, get to where you're going and get back to your car, its pretty exhausting. On tuesday we will have not only internet but also cable, but until then... I will be at the public library.
P.S. Jon- I got the invite for the 3 pimps site, but when I clicked it, it didnt work.. hmm....

Quick, Quick!
Quick (as the name may suggest) update. Rob got a sub job, we got an apartment. More importantly, we all ordered dessert after our dinner at a south african restaurant. I had cake, Sara had a strawberry tart. Rob saw what looked to be a chocolate turnover and ordered that. He took a bite and it turns out it was two hotdogs in a pastry. We laughed our butts off. Well, rob didn't, but...:)

Like Axel Rose said, "all we need (and the only thing we don't have) is just a little patience".

That song reminds me of Paul O'Brien from Ireland- my and lily's rooms were right next to his when we lived in the house and he had this tape single of Guns n' Roses with "Paradise City", "Sweet Child O' Mine" and "Patience" on it, and he would listen to it over and over and sing along to it.
So here we are. In Kalamazoo. Still. Yes, we were supposed to be in New York by now. By yesterday, actually. But we still dont even know if we have the apartment yet. We're just.. waiting. Waiting is not something that I do well. So I've been learning to pass the time with the following activities while waiting to get the phone call/email-
-going to Target and buying underwear
-watching Sex and the City. A lot of it. I'm starting season five now.
-whining
-going to the gym- I know that im about to have a breakdown, because usually I can talk myself out of going to the gym. But for the past few days my thought has been "well, what am I going to do instead, sit around here and wait for a call?" and the thought is actually depressing enough to get me off my ass and out the door.
-eating spaghetti. We haven't bought groceries in a long time because who the hell buys groceries right before they move? So we're trying to use what we have. Which is spaghetti. It's thursday and we've already had it twice this week.
-avoiding calling people. I am actually avoiding returning phone calls because I know that said person will ask me about the apartment and I think I might eventually have a meltdown if I continue to explain this retarded situation.
-watching television shows that make rob want to kill himself. Such as- The Ashlee Simpson Show, Last Comic Standing, Big Brother Season Bagillion. Strictly the best.
There's a good chance that by the next time I post I will have taken up a fun new hobby, like macromae, donating blood platelates, sedating myself. Something to pass the time...

"You Always Resort To Dinosaurs."
 
This is my favorite quote of the week, you can come up with so many stories about how that sentence would come about.  Here's how it really came about.  Rob asked me how much a friend of mine makes a year (wage-wise) and I told him, and then he says "Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to pry or anything."  This of course quickly escalated into nonsense.
me- "whatever, Richard PRYor."
rob- "Pryvate detective"
me- "I'm bringing you in on Pryor charges"
rob- "Lead actor in The Prying Game"
me- "Kentucky Pryed Chicken"
rob- "little white pry"
me- "Pryrannasauras Rex"
rob- "whatever, you always resort to dinosaurs."
Yup, telling you all this story in case you were curious how we were sitting around wasting our lives lately...

Rob and the I'm Mad At You Shirt

That would be a good children's book title, dont you think? So last night, we came home from the bar and I was kind of irritated with Rob because the night before we had this big conversation about how we should save money since we don't have a whole lot coming in right now and we're both going to be without jobs for the whole month of August. So then we go to the bar and Rob has FOUR freaking beers. To me, if you're trying to save money, have two beers and call it good. So anyhow, we go upstairs and I got on the computer and then I go into our room and Rob is wearing this ugly tanktop that I hate. As a brief digression, I don't think that ANY guy looks good in ANY type of tank top shirt, and Rob is well aware of this. He says "this is my "I'm Mad At You" shirt. Any time that I'm wearing this shirt you'll know that I'm mad at you." He then went on to explain that he wasn't taking the shirt off until I apologized. It was hilarious. All day he's been threatening to put the shirt back on. Cringe.

Where my girls at...

Pardon the corny title, I couldn't help myself. I MISS MY GIRL FRIENDS!! Here is what has happened in the past few months to the girls that I used to hang out with- Sara, my lived together for three years ate lots of TCBY watched dumb TV laughed at retarded things and wasted lots of time together friend, has been at camp since May and is moving out to NYC in a week. Erin C., my tuesday night girls night drink Sangria and watch American Idol friend, is living in Knoxville briefly on her way out to South Carolina. Tanya, my drink champagne at Epic friend, moved to Washington. Kenna has, in the three months since I saw her at my wedding, gotten engaged, married and moved to Florida. Jenn, though she hasn't lived in the same town as me for five years now, has moved out to Long Island. Jess is hanging out in D.C. doing Law School. I love to hang out with Jen D., but with different schedules and all we dont see each other more than once or twice a week, and that's with the boys around. I miss hanging out with girls! I miss talking about nothing in particular! I miss c0mplaining about things. Guys - Don't take offense to that, you know that I love you, but every one needs same gender friends. I'm wondering if my recent lack of girl friends has something to do with my sudden infatuation with Sex and the City. I never had an interest in the show until the girls I work with started talking about it. Now I'm almost through the third season. I love it! I want to meet friends for lunch in Manhattan and talk about bad sex and careers and men dressed as sandwiches making sexually explicit remarks when you walk by! I'm that girl now. Do you think that Sex and the City was kind of tailored so that everyone woman could kind of identify with one of the characters? I mean, not to say that every woman fits in one of those four catergories, but I think every one can find something they identify with in one of them. I love Miranda. I thought that I would like Carrie at first, seeing as she is a writer and all, but Miranda has this smart ass sarcastic humor that I love. I hate Charlotte. Please, no one see themselves in Charlotte, okay?

Shady, my friends, shady.
So I'm reading Newsweek last night waiting for a table to leave the restaurant- do you know where 50% of the funds for Nader's campaign is coming from? The Republican party. And now that I'm saying it, I'm thinking to myself, well of course, Republicans prop up Nader and try to take votes away from the Democrats, why didn't I think of that? I will tell you why I didn't think of that- because I am not evil and scheming. What the hell ever happened to two opponents giving their speeches and the best man wins? I for one, would not want to win something knowing that I didnt actually win, that I turned things around in my favor. Have you been approached by anyone asking you to sign a petition to put Nader on the ballot? According to Newsweek, these are also Republicans. Okay, giving money to another campaign to hurt your opponent, that's shady, but whatever. But actually posing as someone for Nader to get him on the ballot and tricking people interested in Nader into signing these petitions? YOU ARE FLAT OUT MISREPRESENTING YOURSELF!! I realize that a much stronger word is in order here, but all I can think of is RUDE!! Seriously, how can we put a party into office (or keep them there, rather) that has such underhanded tactics?!?! When you see something like that is it so hard to believe that weapons of mass destruction never existed? Grrr. I am becoming all political lately. The thing is, I'm not really political, I just REALLY REALLY don't like Bush.
Anyhow, onto other things- My apartment is in ruins. I started trying to pack things up, but really I'm just making one gigantic mess. The thing is, half of this stuff is going into a garage sale, but the garage sale is in Davison, so I can't do anything with it until I go home to Davison.
WHEN ARE WE GOING TO FIND OUT IF WE GOT THE APARTMENT OR NOT!??? I'll be packing up a box and feeling like I'm getting something done when all the sudden I'll think to myself "you know, we dont even for sure have an apartment to move all of this INTO right now.." and its like all of my work is useless...
And lastly but not leastly- Happy 22nd Birthday Jennifer D.!

Hmm.
So I'm listening to the light rock station today and that "havin' a party" song by Rod Stewart comes on. The lyrics, I noticed, are as follows
We're havin a party/dancing to the music/played by the DJ/on the radio/ Cokes are in the ice box/popcorn's on the table/
and im thinking to myself, Wow Rod, that sounds like a blast I'll be right over. Not that Im trying to say that you have to have alcohol to have fun but.. that sounds like Square's Night Out. Yes, I just said 'squares'. Im just that cool.

Disappointed.
Today I rented a movie that was supposed to be really good- it was called 'Elephant' and it was a Gus Van Sant movie. I really like Gus Van Sant. I cannot bring enough thanks to the man who brought Good Will Hunting into existance. What I may have learned though, is that I like Gus Van Sant the director, not the writer. The movie was basically about Columbine without actually saying it was about Columbine. The idea was show the daily life of several students leading up to the shooting. I have never seen a movie so devoid of emotion in my life. The characters said nothing that set them apart from any other stock high school character. While I realize that the idea was to show 'ordinary' students, the problem is that to get an audience involved in a character they have to feel some emotion for that character, whether it be love or hate. If you have a character who's entire conversation consists of "hey, whats up" "nothing, how about you?" "nothing, taking some pictures" "cool, see you man" and then he gets shot, its sad, but you're just not feeling it because you dont feel like that character is real. Even the shooters were apathetic, you just couldnt see their anger. I have a hard time believing that someone would shoot numerous people without having a serious amount of anger. Apathy breeds inactivity and a lack of caring about those around you, but I dont see it fueling a mass murder involving a plan that requires a serious amount of forethought. On a positive note, I thought that he did some really cool perspective things with it- Following a character and then going back to a moment that he/she interacted with another character and switching over and following a different person. Overall though, not what I was hoping. It's okay though Gus, I still love you for Good Will Hunting.

Funniest thing I've heard lately

Rob and I were driving home and there was this girl getting out of her car across the street from our house. She had that hair where it kind of flips up and its shorter, but hers seemed to be all gathered, so the flip came to a point. Rob shakes his head as if it's really too bad and says "she's got Anime-head."

Woes of the Recently UnInsured

So for grad school I have to have the traditional school physical done as well as a Measles/Mumps/Rubella vaccination. Up until May of this year, I had health insurance. So let me give you the heads up. Do you know how much a physical costs w/o insurance? First, lets recap on what a physical entails. Check the blood pressure, check the heart and breathing, check the reflexes, check the ears/nose/mouth, ask if there are any problems, sign a form. This five to ten minute procedure will run you a whopping $150. I'll leave it at that. No snide comments or bitter words, I think it speaks for itself.
Speaking of snide and bitter, there's a fair chance that those two words describe a lot of my posts lately, so I will try to put a little cheer into this post. I greatly enjoyed myself last night- rob and I went out for drinks with jen and ryan and had a great time talking and drinking a bit much (well, I did anyhow). I am excited about going to Blissfest next weekend. I mean really excited. I dont feel like I've been really excited about something in a while. I've been "excited but stressed" and "excited but to busy to think about it". I am just "excited really looking forward to this, think its going to be a fun vacation" excited. Its fourth of july weekend this weekend. Nothing at all planned.
Went to New York with my mom on Monday to look for apartments- we got a cute little studio apartment the size of a shoebox. I love it. Lots of windows, lots of light, bigger bathroom, bigger kitchen, HARDWOOD FLOORS, in a pretty good neighborhood, size of a shoebox. The only downside is that it's a co-op and they want all of this stuff with our application- last two years of tax returns and W-2's, 2 letters of rec for each person, a landlord letter, credit check, last two pay stubs, blood sample, CAT Scan, eye of newt, hair of a unicorn, our first born child. But I think it's worth it. Now, if one of my classes asks me to make a shoebox diarama of my house I can do it to scale.
Got to go to work.

Screw you, Carnie Wilson!

As I was driving home last night from the bar, I was a little depressed. The thing is, I'm only 23 frickin years old and it kind of feels like my whole life is flying by me. I wake up around 9ish in the morning- not too bad- and by the time I get up, eat, go work out, take a shower, have lunch and write for a little while, its time to go to work. Everyday this is what I do. And then a month passes and I go, what the hell, where did that go? And it's summer for God's sake, I should be out doing fun enjoyable things. The other day the waitress at a restaurant said "why aren't you out beach bumming" and I'm like, ha! yeah right, cause I have time for that. And I know I'm not the only one, everyone I know my age is doing the same thing- working like crazy to pay their way through school, grad school, film school or life in general until they either have a degree to get a job doing what they want to do AND make decent money or decide what it is they would like to do. BUT WE'RE FREAKING YOUNG!! doesnt it seem like this is the time when we should be out there doing things that we'll talk about when we're old because right now we have energy and there's a lot of time for possibility in our life because we've got sixty some years left. But we're all out there in grocery stores and restaurants and etc. freaking bored out of our minds ready to scream just trying to make due for the moment. And then, who comes on the radio but Carnie Wilson. Did you know that Wilson Phillips got back together? An unfortunate choice, as they remade "Turn, Turn, Turn" a fantastic song that is sacrilige to remake, but nonetheless. The DJ was talking to her and he's like, we'll, why did you guys break up in the first place? And Carnie's all like "Oh, because I wasn't walking into work everyday and loving what I do. I mean, I just wasn't feeling inspired. And I've always felt that you're vacation should be your vocation. So I just decided I wasnt going to do it anymore." You know what I'd like to say to you, Carnie Wilson? Screw you. You make ample amounts of money singing. Boo Hoo. Do you know how many garbage men there are in this country? do you think they feel inspired to go rid the world of garbage when they wake up? Why I understand what you're saying, that you should really love what you, there are so many people in the world who are just as worthy of a decent job, but dont have the option of quitting their million dollar singing career because they dont feel inspired everyday. Please refrain from coming on the radio in the future, after I have just finished work, and telling me that you took a decade off from singing because your vocation wasn't a vacation. BECAUSE I OFTEN FEEL THAT MY VOCATION IS A VACATION IN HELL.